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<?xml version="1.0"?>
<PLAY>
<TITLE>Much Ado about Nothing</TITLE>
<FM>
<P>Text placed in the public domain by Moby Lexical Tools, 1992.</P>
<P>SGML markup by Jon Bosak, 1992-1994.</P>
<P>XML version by Jon Bosak, 1996-1998.</P>
<P>This work may be freely copied and distributed worldwide.</P>
</FM>
<PERSONAE>
<TITLE>Dramatis Personae</TITLE>
<PERSONA>DON PEDRO, prince of Arragon.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>DON JOHN, his bastard brother.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>CLAUDIO, a young lord of Florence.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>BENEDICK, a young lord of Padua.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>LEONATO, governor of Messina.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>ANTONIO, his brother.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>BALTHASAR, attendant on Don Pedro.</PERSONA>
<PGROUP>
<PERSONA>CONRADE</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>BORACHIO</PERSONA>
<GRPDESCR>followers of Don John.</GRPDESCR>
</PGROUP>
<PERSONA>FRIAR FRANCIS</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>DOGBERRY, a constable.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>VERGES, a headborough.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>A Sexton.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>A Boy.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>HERO, daughter to Leonato.</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>BEATRICE, niece to Leonato.</PERSONA>
<PGROUP>
<PERSONA>MARGARET</PERSONA>
<PERSONA>URSULA</PERSONA>
<GRPDESCR>gentlewomen attending on Hero.</GRPDESCR>
</PGROUP>
<PERSONA>Messengers, Watch, Attendants, &c. </PERSONA>
</PERSONAE>
<SCNDESCR>SCENE Messina.</SCNDESCR>
<PLAYSUBT>MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING</PLAYSUBT>
<ACT><TITLE>ACT I</TITLE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE I. Before LEONATO'S house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO, HERO, and BEATRICE, with a
Messenger</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I learn in this letter that Don Peter of Arragon</LINE>
<LINE>comes this night to Messina.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is very near by this: he was not three leagues off</LINE>
<LINE>when I left him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How many gentlemen have you lost in this action?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But few of any sort, and none of name.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A victory is twice itself when the achiever brings</LINE>
<LINE>home full numbers. I find here that Don Peter hath</LINE>
<LINE>bestowed much honour on a young Florentine called Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Much deserved on his part and equally remembered by</LINE>
<LINE>Don Pedro: he hath borne himself beyond the</LINE>
<LINE>promise of his age, doing, in the figure of a lamb,</LINE>
<LINE>the feats of a lion: he hath indeed better</LINE>
<LINE>bettered expectation than you must expect of me to</LINE>
<LINE>tell you how.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much</LINE>
<LINE>glad of it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I have already delivered him letters, and there</LINE>
<LINE>appears much joy in him; even so much that joy could</LINE>
<LINE>not show itself modest enough without a badge of</LINE>
<LINE>bitterness.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Did he break out into tears?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In great measure.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A kind overflow of kindness: there are no faces</LINE>
<LINE>truer than those that are so washed. How much</LINE>
<LINE>better is it to weep at joy than to joy at weeping!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the</LINE>
<LINE>wars or no?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know none of that name, lady: there was none such</LINE>
<LINE>in the army of any sort.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What is he that you ask for, niece?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, he's returned; and as pleasant as ever he was.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He set up his bills here in Messina and challenged</LINE>
<LINE>Cupid at the flight; and my uncle's fool, reading</LINE>
<LINE>the challenge, subscribed for Cupid, and challenged</LINE>
<LINE>him at the bird-bolt. I pray you, how many hath he</LINE>
<LINE>killed and eaten in these wars? But how many hath</LINE>
<LINE>he killed? for indeed I promised to eat all of his killing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Faith, niece, you tax Signior Benedick too much;</LINE>
<LINE>but he'll be meet with you, I doubt it not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He hath done good service, lady, in these wars.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You had musty victual, and he hath holp to eat it:</LINE>
<LINE>he is a very valiant trencherman; he hath an</LINE>
<LINE>excellent stomach.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And a good soldier too, lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And a good soldier to a lady: but what is he to a lord?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all</LINE>
<LINE>honourable virtues.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man:</LINE>
<LINE>but for the stuffing,--well, we are all mortal.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You must not, sir, mistake my niece. There is a</LINE>
<LINE>kind of merry war betwixt Signior Benedick and her:</LINE>
<LINE>they never meet but there's a skirmish of wit</LINE>
<LINE>between them.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Alas! he gets nothing by that. In our last</LINE>
<LINE>conflict four of his five wits went halting off, and</LINE>
<LINE>now is the whole man governed with one: so that if</LINE>
<LINE>he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let him</LINE>
<LINE>bear it for a difference between himself and his</LINE>
<LINE>horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left,</LINE>
<LINE>to be known a reasonable creature. Who is his</LINE>
<LINE>companion now? He hath every month a new sworn brother.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is't possible?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Very easily possible: he wears his faith but as</LINE>
<LINE>the fashion of his hat; it ever changes with the</LINE>
<LINE>next block.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No; an he were, I would burn my study. But, I pray</LINE>
<LINE>you, who is his companion? Is there no young</LINE>
<LINE>squarer now that will make a voyage with him to the devil?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O Lord, he will hang upon him like a disease: he</LINE>
<LINE>is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker</LINE>
<LINE>runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio! if</LINE>
<LINE>he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a</LINE>
<LINE>thousand pound ere a' be cured.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will hold friends with you, lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do, good friend.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You will never run mad, niece.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, not till a hot January.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Don Pedro is approached.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, DON JOHN, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK,
and BALTHASAR</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good Signior Leonato, you are come to meet your</LINE>
<LINE>trouble: the fashion of the world is to avoid</LINE>
<LINE>cost, and you encounter it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of</LINE>
<LINE>your grace: for trouble being gone, comfort should</LINE>
<LINE>remain; but when you depart from me, sorrow abides</LINE>
<LINE>and happiness takes his leave.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You embrace your charge too willingly. I think this</LINE>
<LINE>is your daughter.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Her mother hath many times told me so.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Were you in doubt, sir, that you asked her?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Signior Benedick, no; for then were you a child.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have it full, Benedick: we may guess by this</LINE>
<LINE>what you are, being a man. Truly, the lady fathers</LINE>
<LINE>herself. Be happy, lady; for you are like an</LINE>
<LINE>honourable father.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If Signior Leonato be her father, she would not</LINE>
<LINE>have his head on her shoulders for all Messina, as</LINE>
<LINE>like him as she is.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior</LINE>
<LINE>Benedick: nobody marks you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is it possible disdain should die while she hath</LINE>
<LINE>such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick?</LINE>
<LINE>Courtesy itself must convert to disdain, if you come</LINE>
<LINE>in her presence.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I</LINE>
<LINE>am loved of all ladies, only you excepted: and I</LINE>
<LINE>would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard</LINE>
<LINE>heart; for, truly, I love none.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A dear happiness to women: they would else have</LINE>
<LINE>been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank God</LINE>
<LINE>and my cold blood, I am of your humour for that: I</LINE>
<LINE>had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man</LINE>
<LINE>swear he loves me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God keep your ladyship still in that mind! so some</LINE>
<LINE>gentleman or other shall 'scape a predestinate</LINE>
<LINE>scratched face.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Scratching could not make it worse, an 'twere such</LINE>
<LINE>a face as yours were.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, you are a rare parrot-teacher.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and</LINE>
<LINE>so good a continuer. But keep your way, i' God's</LINE>
<LINE>name; I have done.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You always end with a jade's trick: I know you of old.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That is the sum of all, Leonato. Signior Claudio</LINE>
<LINE>and Signior Benedick, my dear friend Leonato hath</LINE>
<LINE>invited you all. I tell him we shall stay here at</LINE>
<LINE>the least a month; and he heartily prays some</LINE>
<LINE>occasion may detain us longer. I dare swear he is no</LINE>
<LINE>hypocrite, but prays from his heart.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you swear, my lord, you shall not be forsworn.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>To DON JOHN</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Let me bid you welcome, my lord: being reconciled to</LINE>
<LINE>the prince your brother, I owe you all duty.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I thank you: I am not of many words, but I thank</LINE>
<LINE>you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Please it your grace lead on?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Your hand, Leonato; we will go together.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt all except BENEDICK and CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of Signior Leonato?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I noted her not; but I looked on her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is she not a modest young lady?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do you question me, as an honest man should do, for</LINE>
<LINE>my simple true judgment; or would you have me speak</LINE>
<LINE>after my custom, as being a professed tyrant to their sex?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No; I pray thee speak in sober judgment.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, i' faith, methinks she's too low for a high</LINE>
<LINE>praise, too brown for a fair praise and too little</LINE>
<LINE>for a great praise: only this commendation I can</LINE>
<LINE>afford her, that were she other than she is, she</LINE>
<LINE>were unhandsome; and being no other but as she is, I</LINE>
<LINE>do not like her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou thinkest I am in sport: I pray thee tell me</LINE>
<LINE>truly how thou likest her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Would you buy her, that you inquire after her?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Can the world buy such a jewel?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, and a case to put it into. But speak you this</LINE>
<LINE>with a sad brow? or do you play the flouting Jack,</LINE>
<LINE>to tell us Cupid is a good hare-finder and Vulcan a</LINE>
<LINE>rare carpenter? Come, in what key shall a man take</LINE>
<LINE>you, to go in the song?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I</LINE>
<LINE>looked on.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I can see yet without spectacles and I see no such</LINE>
<LINE>matter: there's her cousin, an she were not</LINE>
<LINE>possessed with a fury, exceeds her as much in beauty</LINE>
<LINE>as the first of May doth the last of December. But I</LINE>
<LINE>hope you have no intent to turn husband, have you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn the</LINE>
<LINE>contrary, if Hero would be my wife.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is't come to this? In faith, hath not the world</LINE>
<LINE>one man but he will wear his cap with suspicion?</LINE>
<LINE>Shall I never see a bachelor of three-score again?</LINE>
<LINE>Go to, i' faith; an thou wilt needs thrust thy neck</LINE>
<LINE>into a yoke, wear the print of it and sigh away</LINE>
<LINE>Sundays. Look Don Pedro is returned to seek you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter DON PEDRO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What secret hath held you here, that you followed</LINE>
<LINE>not to Leonato's?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would your grace would constrain me to tell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I charge thee on thy allegiance.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You hear, Count Claudio: I can be secret as a dumb</LINE>
<LINE>man; I would have you think so; but, on my</LINE>
<LINE>allegiance, mark you this, on my allegiance. He is</LINE>
<LINE>in love. With who? now that is your grace's part.</LINE>
<LINE>Mark how short his answer is;--With Hero, Leonato's</LINE>
<LINE>short daughter.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If this were so, so were it uttered.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Like the old tale, my lord: 'it is not so, nor</LINE>
<LINE>'twas not so, but, indeed, God forbid it should be</LINE>
<LINE>so.'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If my passion change not shortly, God forbid it</LINE>
<LINE>should be otherwise.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Amen, if you love her; for the lady is very well worthy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You speak this to fetch me in, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, I speak my thought.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And, in faith, my lord, I spoke mine.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And, by my two faiths and troths, my lord, I spoke mine.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That I love her, I feel.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That she is worthy, I know.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That I neither feel how she should be loved nor</LINE>
<LINE>know how she should be worthy, is the opinion that</LINE>
<LINE>fire cannot melt out of me: I will die in it at the stake.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou wast ever an obstinate heretic in the despite</LINE>
<LINE>of beauty.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And never could maintain his part but in the force</LINE>
<LINE>of his will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That a woman conceived me, I thank her; that she</LINE>
<LINE>brought me up, I likewise give her most humble</LINE>
<LINE>thanks: but that I will have a recheat winded in my</LINE>
<LINE>forehead, or hang my bugle in an invisible baldrick,</LINE>
<LINE>all women shall pardon me. Because I will not do</LINE>
<LINE>them the wrong to mistrust any, I will do myself the</LINE>
<LINE>right to trust none; and the fine is, for the which</LINE>
<LINE>I may go the finer, I will live a bachelor.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I shall see thee, ere I die, look pale with love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>With anger, with sickness, or with hunger, my lord,</LINE>
<LINE>not with love: prove that ever I lose more blood</LINE>
<LINE>with love than I will get again with drinking, pick</LINE>
<LINE>out mine eyes with a ballad-maker's pen and hang me</LINE>
<LINE>up at the door of a brothel-house for the sign of</LINE>
<LINE>blind Cupid.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, if ever thou dost fall from this faith, thou</LINE>
<LINE>wilt prove a notable argument.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat and shoot</LINE>
<LINE>at me; and he that hits me, let him be clapped on</LINE>
<LINE>the shoulder, and called Adam.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, as time shall try: 'In time the savage bull</LINE>
<LINE>doth bear the yoke.'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The savage bull may; but if ever the sensible</LINE>
<LINE>Benedick bear it, pluck off the bull's horns and set</LINE>
<LINE>them in my forehead: and let me be vilely painted,</LINE>
<LINE>and in such great letters as they write 'Here is</LINE>
<LINE>good horse to hire,' let them signify under my sign</LINE>
<LINE>'Here you may see Benedick the married man.'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If this should ever happen, thou wouldst be horn-mad.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, if Cupid have not spent all his quiver in</LINE>
<LINE>Venice, thou wilt quake for this shortly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I look for an earthquake too, then.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, you temporize with the hours. In the</LINE>
<LINE>meantime, good Signior Benedick, repair to</LINE>
<LINE>Leonato's: commend me to him and tell him I will</LINE>
<LINE>not fail him at supper; for indeed he hath made</LINE>
<LINE>great preparation.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I have almost matter enough in me for such an</LINE>
<LINE>embassage; and so I commit you--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To the tuition of God: From my house, if I had it,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The sixth of July: Your loving friend, Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, mock not, mock not. The body of your</LINE>
<LINE>discourse is sometime guarded with fragments, and</LINE>
<LINE>the guards are but slightly basted on neither: ere</LINE>
<LINE>you flout old ends any further, examine your</LINE>
<LINE>conscience: and so I leave you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My liege, your highness now may do me good.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My love is thine to teach: teach it but how,</LINE>
<LINE>And thou shalt see how apt it is to learn</LINE>
<LINE>Any hard lesson that may do thee good.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hath Leonato any son, my lord?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No child but Hero; she's his only heir.</LINE>
<LINE>Dost thou affect her, Claudio?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, my lord,</LINE>
<LINE>When you went onward on this ended action,</LINE>
<LINE>I look'd upon her with a soldier's eye,</LINE>
<LINE>That liked, but had a rougher task in hand</LINE>
<LINE>Than to drive liking to the name of love:</LINE>
<LINE>But now I am return'd and that war-thoughts</LINE>
<LINE>Have left their places vacant, in their rooms</LINE>
<LINE>Come thronging soft and delicate desires,</LINE>
<LINE>All prompting me how fair young Hero is,</LINE>
<LINE>Saying, I liked her ere I went to wars.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou wilt be like a lover presently</LINE>
<LINE>And tire the hearer with a book of words.</LINE>
<LINE>If thou dost love fair Hero, cherish it,</LINE>
<LINE>And I will break with her and with her father,</LINE>
<LINE>And thou shalt have her. Was't not to this end</LINE>
<LINE>That thou began'st to twist so fine a story?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How sweetly you do minister to love,</LINE>
<LINE>That know love's grief by his complexion!</LINE>
<LINE>But lest my liking might too sudden seem,</LINE>
<LINE>I would have salved it with a longer treatise.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What need the bridge much broader than the flood?</LINE>
<LINE>The fairest grant is the necessity.</LINE>
<LINE>Look, what will serve is fit: 'tis once, thou lovest,</LINE>
<LINE>And I will fit thee with the remedy.</LINE>
<LINE>I know we shall have revelling to-night:</LINE>
<LINE>I will assume thy part in some disguise</LINE>
<LINE>And tell fair Hero I am Claudio,</LINE>
<LINE>And in her bosom I'll unclasp my heart</LINE>
<LINE>And take her hearing prisoner with the force</LINE>
<LINE>And strong encounter of my amorous tale:</LINE>
<LINE>Then after to her father will I break;</LINE>
<LINE>And the conclusion is, she shall be thine.</LINE>
<LINE>In practise let us put it presently.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE II. A room in LEONATO's house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO and ANTONIO, meeting</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How now, brother! Where is my cousin, your son?</LINE>
<LINE>hath he provided this music?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is very busy about it. But, brother, I can tell</LINE>
<LINE>you strange news that you yet dreamt not of.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Are they good?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>As the event stamps them: but they have a good</LINE>
<LINE>cover; they show well outward. The prince and Count</LINE>
<LINE>Claudio, walking in a thick-pleached alley in mine</LINE>
<LINE>orchard, were thus much overheard by a man of mine:</LINE>
<LINE>the prince discovered to Claudio that he loved my</LINE>
<LINE>niece your daughter and meant to acknowledge it</LINE>
<LINE>this night in a dance: and if he found her</LINE>
<LINE>accordant, he meant to take the present time by the</LINE>
<LINE>top and instantly break with you of it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hath the fellow any wit that told you this?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A good sharp fellow: I will send for him; and</LINE>
<LINE>question him yourself.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, no; we will hold it as a dream till it appear</LINE>
<LINE>itself: but I will acquaint my daughter withal,</LINE>
<LINE>that she may be the better prepared for an answer,</LINE>
<LINE>if peradventure this be true. Go you and tell her of it.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter Attendants</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Cousins, you know what you have to do. O, I cry you</LINE>
<LINE>mercy, friend; go you with me, and I will use your</LINE>
<LINE>skill. Good cousin, have a care this busy time.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE III. The same.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON JOHN and CONRADE</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What the good-year, my lord! why are you thus out</LINE>
<LINE>of measure sad?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There is no measure in the occasion that breeds;</LINE>
<LINE>therefore the sadness is without limit.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You should hear reason.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And when I have heard it, what blessing brings it?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If not a present remedy, at least a patient</LINE>
<LINE>sufferance.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I wonder that thou, being, as thou sayest thou art,</LINE>
<LINE>born under Saturn, goest about to apply a moral</LINE>
<LINE>medicine to a mortifying mischief. I cannot hide</LINE>
<LINE>what I am: I must be sad when I have cause and smile</LINE>
<LINE>at no man's jests, eat when I have stomach and wait</LINE>
<LINE>for no man's leisure, sleep when I am drowsy and</LINE>
<LINE>tend on no man's business, laugh when I am merry and</LINE>
<LINE>claw no man in his humour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, but you must not make the full show of this</LINE>
<LINE>till you may do it without controlment. You have of</LINE>
<LINE>late stood out against your brother, and he hath</LINE>
<LINE>ta'en you newly into his grace; where it is</LINE>
<LINE>impossible you should take true root but by the</LINE>
<LINE>fair weather that you make yourself: it is needful</LINE>
<LINE>that you frame the season for your own harvest.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I had rather be a canker in a hedge than a rose in</LINE>
<LINE>his grace, and it better fits my blood to be</LINE>
<LINE>disdained of all than to fashion a carriage to rob</LINE>
<LINE>love from any: in this, though I cannot be said to</LINE>
<LINE>be a flattering honest man, it must not be denied</LINE>
<LINE>but I am a plain-dealing villain. I am trusted with</LINE>
<LINE>a muzzle and enfranchised with a clog; therefore I</LINE>
<LINE>have decreed not to sing in my cage. If I had my</LINE>
<LINE>mouth, I would bite; if I had my liberty, I would do</LINE>
<LINE>my liking: in the meantime let me be that I am and</LINE>
<LINE>seek not to alter me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Can you make no use of your discontent?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I make all use of it, for I use it only.</LINE>
<LINE>Who comes here?</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BORACHIO</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>What news, Borachio?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I came yonder from a great supper: the prince your</LINE>
<LINE>brother is royally entertained by Leonato: and I</LINE>
<LINE>can give you intelligence of an intended marriage.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will it serve for any model to build mischief on?</LINE>
<LINE>What is he for a fool that betroths himself to</LINE>
<LINE>unquietness?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, it is your brother's right hand.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Who? the most exquisite Claudio?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Even he.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A proper squire! And who, and who? which way looks</LINE>
<LINE>he?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, on Hero, the daughter and heir of Leonato.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A very forward March-chick! How came you to this?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Being entertained for a perfumer, as I was smoking a</LINE>
<LINE>musty room, comes me the prince and Claudio, hand</LINE>
<LINE>in hand in sad conference: I whipt me behind the</LINE>
<LINE>arras; and there heard it agreed upon that the</LINE>
<LINE>prince should woo Hero for himself, and having</LINE>
<LINE>obtained her, give her to Count Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, come, let us thither: this may prove food to</LINE>
<LINE>my displeasure. That young start-up hath all the</LINE>
<LINE>glory of my overthrow: if I can cross him any way, I</LINE>
<LINE>bless myself every way. You are both sure, and will assist me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To the death, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Let us to the great supper: their cheer is the</LINE>
<LINE>greater that I am subdued. Would the cook were of</LINE>
<LINE>my mind! Shall we go prove what's to be done?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We'll wait upon your lordship.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
</ACT>
<ACT><TITLE>ACT II</TITLE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE I. A hall in LEONATO'S house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO, ANTONIO, HERO, BEATRICE, and others</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Was not Count John here at supper?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I saw him not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How tartly that gentleman looks! I never can see</LINE>
<LINE>him but I am heart-burned an hour after.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is of a very melancholy disposition.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He were an excellent man that were made just in the</LINE>
<LINE>midway between him and Benedick: the one is too</LINE>
<LINE>like an image and says nothing, and the other too</LINE>
<LINE>like my lady's eldest son, evermore tattling.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Then half Signior Benedick's tongue in Count John's</LINE>
<LINE>mouth, and half Count John's melancholy in Signior</LINE>
<LINE>Benedick's face,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>With a good leg and a good foot, uncle, and money</LINE>
<LINE>enough in his purse, such a man would win any woman</LINE>
<LINE>in the world, if a' could get her good-will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, niece, thou wilt never get thee a</LINE>
<LINE>husband, if thou be so shrewd of thy tongue.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In faith, she's too curst.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Too curst is more than curst: I shall lessen God's</LINE>
<LINE>sending that way; for it is said, 'God sends a curst</LINE>
<LINE>cow short horns;' but to a cow too curst he sends none.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So, by being too curst, God will send you no horns.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Just, if he send me no husband; for the which</LINE>
<LINE>blessing I am at him upon my knees every morning and</LINE>
<LINE>evening. Lord, I could not endure a husband with a</LINE>
<LINE>beard on his face: I had rather lie in the woollen.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You may light on a husband that hath no beard.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What should I do with him? dress him in my apparel</LINE>
<LINE>and make him my waiting-gentlewoman? He that hath a</LINE>
<LINE>beard is more than a youth, and he that hath no</LINE>
<LINE>beard is less than a man: and he that is more than</LINE>
<LINE>a youth is not for me, and he that is less than a</LINE>
<LINE>man, I am not for him: therefore, I will even take</LINE>
<LINE>sixpence in earnest of the bear-ward, and lead his</LINE>
<LINE>apes into hell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, then, go you into hell?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, but to the gate; and there will the devil meet</LINE>
<LINE>me, like an old cuckold, with horns on his head, and</LINE>
<LINE>say 'Get you to heaven, Beatrice, get you to</LINE>
<LINE>heaven; here's no place for you maids:' so deliver</LINE>
<LINE>I up my apes, and away to Saint Peter for the</LINE>
<LINE>heavens; he shows me where the bachelors sit, and</LINE>
<LINE>there live we as merry as the day is long.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>To HERO</STAGEDIR> Well, niece, I trust you will be ruled</LINE>
<LINE>by your father.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, faith; it is my cousin's duty to make curtsy</LINE>
<LINE>and say 'Father, as it please you.' But yet for all</LINE>
<LINE>that, cousin, let him be a handsome fellow, or else</LINE>
<LINE>make another curtsy and say 'Father, as it please</LINE>
<LINE>me.'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, niece, I hope to see you one day fitted with a husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not till God make men of some other metal than</LINE>
<LINE>earth. Would it not grieve a woman to be</LINE>
<LINE>overmastered with a pierce of valiant dust? to make</LINE>
<LINE>an account of her life to a clod of wayward marl?</LINE>
<LINE>No, uncle, I'll none: Adam's sons are my brethren;</LINE>
<LINE>and, truly, I hold it a sin to match in my kindred.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Daughter, remember what I told you: if the prince</LINE>
<LINE>do solicit you in that kind, you know your answer.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The fault will be in the music, cousin, if you be</LINE>
<LINE>not wooed in good time: if the prince be too</LINE>
<LINE>important, tell him there is measure in every thing</LINE>
<LINE>and so dance out the answer. For, hear me, Hero:</LINE>
<LINE>wooing, wedding, and repenting, is as a Scotch jig,</LINE>
<LINE>a measure, and a cinque pace: the first suit is hot</LINE>
<LINE>and hasty, like a Scotch jig, and full as</LINE>
<LINE>fantastical; the wedding, mannerly-modest, as a</LINE>
<LINE>measure, full of state and ancientry; and then comes</LINE>
<LINE>repentance and, with his bad legs, falls into the</LINE>
<LINE>cinque pace faster and faster, till he sink into his grave.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Cousin, you apprehend passing shrewdly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I have a good eye, uncle; I can see a church by daylight.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The revellers are entering, brother: make good room.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>All put on their masks</STAGEDIR>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, BALTHASAR,
DON JOHN, BORACHIO, MARGARET, URSULA and others, masked</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady, will you walk about with your friend?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So you walk softly and look sweetly and say nothing,</LINE>
<LINE>I am yours for the walk; and especially when I walk away.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>With me in your company?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I may say so, when I please.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And when please you to say so?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>When I like your favour; for God defend the lute</LINE>
<LINE>should be like the case!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My visor is Philemon's roof; within the house is Jove.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then, your visor should be thatched.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Speak low, if you speak love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Drawing her aside</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, I would you did like me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So would not I, for your own sake; for I have many</LINE>
<LINE>ill-qualities.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Which is one?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I say my prayers aloud.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I love you the better: the hearers may cry, Amen.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God match me with a good dancer!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Amen.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And God keep him out of my sight when the dance is</LINE>
<LINE>done! Answer, clerk.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No more words: the clerk is answered.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know you well enough; you are Signior Antonio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>At a word, I am not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know you by the waggling of your head.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To tell you true, I counterfeit him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You could never do him so ill-well, unless you were</LINE>
<LINE>the very man. Here's his dry hand up and down: you</LINE>
<LINE>are he, you are he.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>At a word, I am not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, come, do you think I do not know you by your</LINE>
<LINE>excellent wit? can virtue hide itself? Go to,</LINE>
<LINE>mum, you are he: graces will appear, and there's an</LINE>
<LINE>end.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will you not tell me who told you so?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, you shall pardon me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nor will you not tell me who you are?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not now.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That I was disdainful, and that I had my good wit</LINE>
<LINE>out of the 'Hundred Merry Tales:'--well this was</LINE>
<LINE>Signior Benedick that said so.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What's he?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am sure you know him well enough.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not I, believe me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Did he never make you laugh?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray you, what is he?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, he is the prince's jester: a very dull fool;</LINE>
<LINE>only his gift is in devising impossible slanders:</LINE>
<LINE>none but libertines delight in him; and the</LINE>
<LINE>commendation is not in his wit, but in his villany;</LINE>
<LINE>for he both pleases men and angers them, and then</LINE>
<LINE>they laugh at him and beat him. I am sure he is in</LINE>
<LINE>the fleet: I would he had boarded me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>When I know the gentleman, I'll tell him what you say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do, do: he'll but break a comparison or two on me;</LINE>
<LINE>which, peradventure not marked or not laughed at,</LINE>
<LINE>strikes him into melancholy; and then there's a</LINE>
<LINE>partridge wing saved, for the fool will eat no</LINE>
<LINE>supper that night.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Music</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>We must follow the leaders.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In every good thing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, if they lead to any ill, I will leave them at</LINE>
<LINE>the next turning.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Dance. Then exeunt all except DON JOHN, BORACHIO,
and CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sure my brother is amorous on Hero and hath</LINE>
<LINE>withdrawn her father to break with him about it.</LINE>
<LINE>The ladies follow her and but one visor remains.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And that is Claudio: I know him by his bearing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Are not you Signior Benedick?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You know me well; I am he.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Signior, you are very near my brother in his love:</LINE>
<LINE>he is enamoured on Hero; I pray you, dissuade him</LINE>
<LINE>from her: she is no equal for his birth: you may</LINE>
<LINE>do the part of an honest man in it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How know you he loves her?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I heard him swear his affection.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So did I too; and he swore he would marry her to-night.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, let us to the banquet.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt DON JOHN and BORACHIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thus answer I in the name of Benedick,</LINE>
<LINE>But hear these ill news with the ears of Claudio.</LINE>
<LINE>'Tis certain so; the prince wooes for himself.</LINE>
<LINE>Friendship is constant in all other things</LINE>
<LINE>Save in the office and affairs of love:</LINE>
<LINE>Therefore, all hearts in love use their own tongues;</LINE>
<LINE>Let every eye negotiate for itself</LINE>
<LINE>And trust no agent; for beauty is a witch</LINE>
<LINE>Against whose charms faith melteth into blood.</LINE>
<LINE>This is an accident of hourly proof,</LINE>
<LINE>Which I mistrusted not. Farewell, therefore, Hero!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter BENEDICK</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Count Claudio?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, the same.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, will you go with me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Whither?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Even to the next willow, about your own business,</LINE>
<LINE>county. What fashion will you wear the garland of?</LINE>
<LINE>about your neck, like an usurer's chain? or under</LINE>
<LINE>your arm, like a lieutenant's scarf? You must wear</LINE>
<LINE>it one way, for the prince hath got your Hero.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I wish him joy of her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, that's spoken like an honest drovier: so they</LINE>
<LINE>sell bullocks. But did you think the prince would</LINE>
<LINE>have served you thus?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray you, leave me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ho! now you strike like the blind man: 'twas the</LINE>
<LINE>boy that stole your meat, and you'll beat the post.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If it will not be, I'll leave you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Alas, poor hurt fowl! now will he creep into sedges.</LINE>
<LINE>But that my Lady Beatrice should know me, and not</LINE>
<LINE>know me! The prince's fool! Ha? It may be I go</LINE>
<LINE>under that title because I am merry. Yea, but so I</LINE>
<LINE>am apt to do myself wrong; I am not so reputed: it</LINE>
<LINE>is the base, though bitter, disposition of Beatrice</LINE>
<LINE>that puts the world into her person and so gives me</LINE>
<LINE>out. Well, I'll be revenged as I may.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter DON PEDRO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, signior, where's the count? did you see him?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Troth, my lord, I have played the part of Lady Fame.</LINE>
<LINE>I found him here as melancholy as a lodge in a</LINE>
<LINE>warren: I told him, and I think I told him true,</LINE>
<LINE>that your grace had got the good will of this young</LINE>
<LINE>lady; and I offered him my company to a willow-tree,</LINE>
<LINE>either to make him a garland, as being forsaken, or</LINE>
<LINE>to bind him up a rod, as being worthy to be whipped.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To be whipped! What's his fault?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The flat transgression of a schoolboy, who, being</LINE>
<LINE>overjoyed with finding a birds' nest, shows it his</LINE>
<LINE>companion, and he steals it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Wilt thou make a trust a transgression? The</LINE>
<LINE>transgression is in the stealer.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yet it had not been amiss the rod had been made,</LINE>
<LINE>and the garland too; for the garland he might have</LINE>
<LINE>worn himself, and the rod he might have bestowed on</LINE>
<LINE>you, who, as I take it, have stolen his birds' nest.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will but teach them to sing, and restore them to</LINE>
<LINE>the owner.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If their singing answer your saying, by my faith,</LINE>
<LINE>you say honestly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The Lady Beatrice hath a quarrel to you: the</LINE>
<LINE>gentleman that danced with her told her she is much</LINE>
<LINE>wronged by you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, she misused me past the endurance of a block!</LINE>
<LINE>an oak but with one green leaf on it would have</LINE>
<LINE>answered her; my very visor began to assume life and</LINE>
<LINE>scold with her. She told me, not thinking I had been</LINE>
<LINE>myself, that I was the prince's jester, that I was</LINE>
<LINE>duller than a great thaw; huddling jest upon jest</LINE>
<LINE>with such impossible conveyance upon me that I stood</LINE>
<LINE>like a man at a mark, with a whole army shooting at</LINE>
<LINE>me. She speaks poniards, and every word stabs:</LINE>
<LINE>if her breath were as terrible as her terminations,</LINE>
<LINE>there were no living near her; she would infect to</LINE>
<LINE>the north star. I would not marry her, though she</LINE>
<LINE>were endowed with all that Adam bad left him before</LINE>
<LINE>he transgressed: she would have made Hercules have</LINE>
<LINE>turned spit, yea, and have cleft his club to make</LINE>
<LINE>the fire too. Come, talk not of her: you shall find</LINE>
<LINE>her the infernal Ate in good apparel. I would to God</LINE>
<LINE>some scholar would conjure her; for certainly, while</LINE>
<LINE>she is here, a man may live as quiet in hell as in a</LINE>
<LINE>sanctuary; and people sin upon purpose, because they</LINE>
<LINE>would go thither; so, indeed, all disquiet, horror</LINE>
<LINE>and perturbation follows her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Look, here she comes.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter CLAUDIO, BEATRICE, HERO, and LEONATO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will your grace command me any service to the</LINE>
<LINE>world's end? I will go on the slightest errand now</LINE>
<LINE>to the Antipodes that you can devise to send me on;</LINE>
<LINE>I will fetch you a tooth-picker now from the</LINE>
<LINE>furthest inch of Asia, bring you the length of</LINE>
<LINE>Prester John's foot, fetch you a hair off the great</LINE>
<LINE>Cham's beard, do you any embassage to the Pigmies,</LINE>
<LINE>rather than hold three words' conference with this</LINE>
<LINE>harpy. You have no employment for me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>None, but to desire your good company.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O God, sir, here's a dish I love not: I cannot</LINE>
<LINE>endure my Lady Tongue.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, lady, come; you have lost the heart of</LINE>
<LINE>Signior Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Indeed, my lord, he lent it me awhile; and I gave</LINE>
<LINE>him use for it, a double heart for his single one:</LINE>
<LINE>marry, once before he won it of me with false dice,</LINE>
<LINE>therefore your grace may well say I have lost it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have put him down, lady, you have put him down.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So I would not he should do me, my lord, lest I</LINE>
<LINE>should prove the mother of fools. I have brought</LINE>
<LINE>Count Claudio, whom you sent me to seek.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, how now, count! wherefore are you sad?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not sad, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How then? sick?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Neither, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The count is neither sad, nor sick, nor merry, nor</LINE>
<LINE>well; but civil count, civil as an orange, and</LINE>
<LINE>something of that jealous complexion.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I' faith, lady, I think your blazon to be true;</LINE>
<LINE>though, I'll be sworn, if he be so, his conceit is</LINE>
<LINE>false. Here, Claudio, I have wooed in thy name, and</LINE>
<LINE>fair Hero is won: I have broke with her father,</LINE>
<LINE>and his good will obtained: name the day of</LINE>
<LINE>marriage, and God give thee joy!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Count, take of me my daughter, and with her my</LINE>
<LINE>fortunes: his grace hath made the match, and an</LINE>
<LINE>grace say Amen to it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Speak, count, 'tis your cue.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Silence is the perfectest herald of joy: I were</LINE>
<LINE>but little happy, if I could say how much. Lady, as</LINE>
<LINE>you are mine, I am yours: I give away myself for</LINE>
<LINE>you and dote upon the exchange.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Speak, cousin; or, if you cannot, stop his mouth</LINE>
<LINE>with a kiss, and let not him speak neither.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In faith, lady, you have a merry heart.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, my lord; I thank it, poor fool, it keeps on</LINE>
<LINE>the windy side of care. My cousin tells him in his</LINE>
<LINE>ear that he is in her heart.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And so she doth, cousin.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good Lord, for alliance! Thus goes every one to the</LINE>
<LINE>world but I, and I am sunburnt; I may sit in a</LINE>
<LINE>corner and cry heigh-ho for a husband!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady Beatrice, I will get you one.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would rather have one of your father's getting.</LINE>
<LINE>Hath your grace ne'er a brother like you? Your</LINE>
<LINE>father got excellent husbands, if a maid could come by them.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will you have me, lady?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, my lord, unless I might have another for</LINE>
<LINE>working-days: your grace is too costly to wear</LINE>
<LINE>every day. But, I beseech your grace, pardon me: I</LINE>
<LINE>was born to speak all mirth and no matter.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Your silence most offends me, and to be merry best</LINE>
<LINE>becomes you; for, out of question, you were born in</LINE>
<LINE>a merry hour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, sure, my lord, my mother cried; but then there</LINE>
<LINE>was a star danced, and under that was I born.</LINE>
<LINE>Cousins, God give you joy!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Niece, will you look to those things I told you of?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I cry you mercy, uncle. By your grace's pardon.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, a pleasant-spirited lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There's little of the melancholy element in her, my</LINE>
<LINE>lord: she is never sad but when she sleeps, and</LINE>
<LINE>not ever sad then; for I have heard my daughter say,</LINE>
<LINE>she hath often dreamed of unhappiness and waked</LINE>
<LINE>herself with laughing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She cannot endure to hear tell of a husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, by no means: she mocks all her wooers out of suit.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She were an excellent wife for Benedict.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O Lord, my lord, if they were but a week married,</LINE>
<LINE>they would talk themselves mad.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>County Claudio, when mean you to go to church?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To-morrow, my lord: time goes on crutches till love</LINE>
<LINE>have all his rites.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not till Monday, my dear son, which is hence a just</LINE>
<LINE>seven-night; and a time too brief, too, to have all</LINE>
<LINE>things answer my mind.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, you shake the head at so long a breathing:</LINE>
<LINE>but, I warrant thee, Claudio, the time shall not go</LINE>
<LINE>dully by us. I will in the interim undertake one of</LINE>
<LINE>Hercules' labours; which is, to bring Signior</LINE>
<LINE>Benedick and the Lady Beatrice into a mountain of</LINE>
<LINE>affection the one with the other. I would fain have</LINE>
<LINE>it a match, and I doubt not but to fashion it, if</LINE>
<LINE>you three will but minister such assistance as I</LINE>
<LINE>shall give you direction.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, I am for you, though it cost me ten</LINE>
<LINE>nights' watchings.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And I, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And you too, gentle Hero?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will do any modest office, my lord, to help my</LINE>
<LINE>cousin to a good husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And Benedick is not the unhopefullest husband that</LINE>
<LINE>I know. Thus far can I praise him; he is of a noble</LINE>
<LINE>strain, of approved valour and confirmed honesty. I</LINE>
<LINE>will teach you how to humour your cousin, that she</LINE>
<LINE>shall fall in love with Benedick; and I, with your</LINE>
<LINE>two helps, will so practise on Benedick that, in</LINE>
<LINE>despite of his quick wit and his queasy stomach, he</LINE>
<LINE>shall fall in love with Beatrice. If we can do this,</LINE>
<LINE>Cupid is no longer an archer: his glory shall be</LINE>
<LINE>ours, for we are the only love-gods. Go in with me,</LINE>
<LINE>and I will tell you my drift.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE II. The same.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON JOHN and BORACHIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is so; the Count Claudio shall marry the</LINE>
<LINE>daughter of Leonato.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, my lord; but I can cross it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Any bar, any cross, any impediment will be</LINE>
<LINE>medicinable to me: I am sick in displeasure to him,</LINE>
<LINE>and whatsoever comes athwart his affection ranges</LINE>
<LINE>evenly with mine. How canst thou cross this marriage?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not honestly, my lord; but so covertly that no</LINE>
<LINE>dishonesty shall appear in me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Show me briefly how.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I think I told your lordship a year since, how much</LINE>
<LINE>I am in the favour of Margaret, the waiting</LINE>
<LINE>gentlewoman to Hero.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I remember.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I can, at any unseasonable instant of the night,</LINE>
<LINE>appoint her to look out at her lady's chamber window.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What life is in that, to be the death of this marriage?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The poison of that lies in you to temper. Go you to</LINE>
<LINE>the prince your brother; spare not to tell him that</LINE>
<LINE>he hath wronged his honour in marrying the renowned</LINE>
<LINE>Claudio--whose estimation do you mightily hold</LINE>
<LINE>up--to a contaminated stale, such a one as Hero.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What proof shall I make of that?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Proof enough to misuse the prince, to vex Claudio,</LINE>
<LINE>to undo Hero and kill Leonato. Look you for any</LINE>
<LINE>other issue?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Only to despite them, I will endeavour any thing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Go, then; find me a meet hour to draw Don Pedro and</LINE>
<LINE>the Count Claudio alone: tell them that you know</LINE>
<LINE>that Hero loves me; intend a kind of zeal both to the</LINE>
<LINE>prince and Claudio, as,--in love of your brother's</LINE>
<LINE>honour, who hath made this match, and his friend's</LINE>
<LINE>reputation, who is thus like to be cozened with the</LINE>
<LINE>semblance of a maid,--that you have discovered</LINE>
<LINE>thus. They will scarcely believe this without trial:</LINE>
<LINE>offer them instances; which shall bear no less</LINE>
<LINE>likelihood than to see me at her chamber-window,</LINE>
<LINE>hear me call Margaret Hero, hear Margaret term me</LINE>
<LINE>Claudio; and bring them to see this the very night</LINE>
<LINE>before the intended wedding,--for in the meantime I</LINE>
<LINE>will so fashion the matter that Hero shall be</LINE>
<LINE>absent,--and there shall appear such seeming truth</LINE>
<LINE>of Hero's disloyalty that jealousy shall be called</LINE>
<LINE>assurance and all the preparation overthrown.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Grow this to what adverse issue it can, I will put</LINE>
<LINE>it in practise. Be cunning in the working this, and</LINE>
<LINE>thy fee is a thousand ducats.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Be you constant in the accusation, and my cunning</LINE>
<LINE>shall not shame me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will presently go learn their day of marriage.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE III. LEONATO'S orchard.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BENEDICK</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Boy!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter Boy</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Boy</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Signior?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In my chamber-window lies a book: bring it hither</LINE>
<LINE>to me in the orchard.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Boy</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am here already, sir.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know that; but I would have thee hence, and here again.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Exit Boy</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>I do much wonder that one man, seeing how much</LINE>
<LINE>another man is a fool when he dedicates his</LINE>
<LINE>behaviors to love, will, after he hath laughed at</LINE>
<LINE>such shallow follies in others, become the argument</LINE>
<LINE>of his own scorn by failing in love: and such a man</LINE>
<LINE>is Claudio. I have known when there was no music</LINE>
<LINE>with him but the drum and the fife; and now had he</LINE>
<LINE>rather hear the tabour and the pipe: I have known</LINE>
<LINE>when he would have walked ten mile a-foot to see a</LINE>
<LINE>good armour; and now will he lie ten nights awake,</LINE>
<LINE>carving the fashion of a new doublet. He was wont to</LINE>
<LINE>speak plain and to the purpose, like an honest man</LINE>
<LINE>and a soldier; and now is he turned orthography; his</LINE>
<LINE>words are a very fantastical banquet, just so many</LINE>
<LINE>strange dishes. May I be so converted and see with</LINE>
<LINE>these eyes? I cannot tell; I think not: I will not</LINE>
<LINE>be sworn, but love may transform me to an oyster; but</LINE>
<LINE>I'll take my oath on it, till he have made an oyster</LINE>
<LINE>of me, he shall never make me such a fool. One woman</LINE>
<LINE>is fair, yet I am well; another is wise, yet I am</LINE>
<LINE>well; another virtuous, yet I am well; but till all</LINE>
<LINE>graces be in one woman, one woman shall not come in</LINE>
<LINE>my grace. Rich she shall be, that's certain; wise,</LINE>
<LINE>or I'll none; virtuous, or I'll never cheapen her;</LINE>
<LINE>fair, or I'll never look on her; mild, or come not</LINE>
<LINE>near me; noble, or not I for an angel; of good</LINE>
<LINE>discourse, an excellent musician, and her hair shall</LINE>
<LINE>be of what colour it please God. Ha! the prince and</LINE>
<LINE>Monsieur Love! I will hide me in the arbour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Withdraws</STAGEDIR>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and LEONATO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, shall we hear this music?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, my good lord. How still the evening is,</LINE>
<LINE>As hush'd on purpose to grace harmony!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>See you where Benedick hath hid himself?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, very well, my lord: the music ended,</LINE>
<LINE>We'll fit the kid-fox with a pennyworth.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BALTHASAR with Music</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, Balthasar, we'll hear that song again.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, good my lord, tax not so bad a voice</LINE>
<LINE>To slander music any more than once.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is the witness still of excellency</LINE>
<LINE>To put a strange face on his own perfection.</LINE>
<LINE>I pray thee, sing, and let me woo no more.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Because you talk of wooing, I will sing;</LINE>
<LINE>Since many a wooer doth commence his suit</LINE>
<LINE>To her he thinks not worthy, yet he wooes,</LINE>
<LINE>Yet will he swear he loves.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, pray thee, come;</LINE>
<LINE>Or, if thou wilt hold longer argument,</LINE>
<LINE>Do it in notes.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Note this before my notes;</LINE>
<LINE>There's not a note of mine that's worth the noting.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, these are very crotchets that he speaks;</LINE>
<LINE>Note, notes, forsooth, and nothing.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Air</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, divine air! now is his soul ravished! Is it</LINE>
<LINE>not strange that sheeps' guts should hale souls out</LINE>
<LINE>of men's bodies? Well, a horn for my money, when</LINE>
<LINE>all's done.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>The Song</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,</LINE>
<LINE>Men were deceivers ever,</LINE>
<LINE>One foot in sea and one on shore,</LINE>
<LINE>To one thing constant never:</LINE>
<LINE>Then sigh not so, but let them go,</LINE>
<LINE>And be you blithe and bonny,</LINE>
<LINE>Converting all your sounds of woe</LINE>
<LINE>Into Hey nonny, nonny.</LINE>
<LINE>Sing no more ditties, sing no moe,</LINE>
<LINE>Of dumps so dull and heavy;</LINE>
<LINE>The fraud of men was ever so,</LINE>
<LINE>Since summer first was leafy:</LINE>
<LINE>Then sigh not so, &c.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, a good song.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And an ill singer, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ha, no, no, faith; thou singest well enough for a shift.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>An he had been a dog that should have howled thus,</LINE>
<LINE>they would have hanged him: and I pray God his bad</LINE>
<LINE>voice bode no mischief. I had as lief have heard the</LINE>
<LINE>night-raven, come what plague could have come after</LINE>
<LINE>it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, marry, dost thou hear, Balthasar? I pray thee,</LINE>
<LINE>get us some excellent music; for to-morrow night we</LINE>
<LINE>would have it at the Lady Hero's chamber-window.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BALTHASAR</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The best I can, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do so: farewell.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Exit BALTHASAR</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Come hither, Leonato. What was it you told me of</LINE>
<LINE>to-day, that your niece Beatrice was in love with</LINE>
<LINE>Signior Benedick?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, ay: stalk on. stalk on; the fowl sits. I did</LINE>
<LINE>never think that lady would have loved any man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, nor I neither; but most wonderful that she</LINE>
<LINE>should so dote on Signior Benedick, whom she hath in</LINE>
<LINE>all outward behaviors seemed ever to abhor.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is't possible? Sits the wind in that corner?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, my lord, I cannot tell what to think</LINE>
<LINE>of it but that she loves him with an enraged</LINE>
<LINE>affection: it is past the infinite of thought.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>May be she doth but counterfeit.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Faith, like enough.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O God, counterfeit! There was never counterfeit of</LINE>
<LINE>passion came so near the life of passion as she</LINE>
<LINE>discovers it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, what effects of passion shows she?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Bait the hook well; this fish will bite.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What effects, my lord? She will sit you, you heard</LINE>
<LINE>my daughter tell you how.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She did, indeed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How, how, pray you? You amaze me: I would have I</LINE>
<LINE>thought her spirit had been invincible against all</LINE>
<LINE>assaults of affection.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would have sworn it had, my lord; especially</LINE>
<LINE>against Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I should think this a gull, but that the</LINE>
<LINE>white-bearded fellow speaks it: knavery cannot,</LINE>
<LINE>sure, hide himself in such reverence.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He hath ta'en the infection: hold it up.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hath she made her affection known to Benedick?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No; and swears she never will: that's her torment.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis true, indeed; so your daughter says: 'Shall</LINE>
<LINE>I,' says she, 'that have so oft encountered him</LINE>
<LINE>with scorn, write to him that I love him?'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This says she now when she is beginning to write to</LINE>
<LINE>him; for she'll be up twenty times a night, and</LINE>
<LINE>there will she sit in her smock till she have writ a</LINE>
<LINE>sheet of paper: my daughter tells us all.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now you talk of a sheet of paper, I remember a</LINE>
<LINE>pretty jest your daughter told us of.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, when she had writ it and was reading it over, she</LINE>
<LINE>found Benedick and Beatrice between the sheet?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, she tore the letter into a thousand halfpence;</LINE>
<LINE>railed at herself, that she should be so immodest</LINE>
<LINE>to write to one that she knew would flout her; 'I</LINE>
<LINE>measure him,' says she, 'by my own spirit; for I</LINE>
<LINE>should flout him, if he writ to me; yea, though I</LINE>
<LINE>love him, I should.'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Then down upon her knees she falls, weeps, sobs,</LINE>
<LINE>beats her heart, tears her hair, prays, curses; 'O</LINE>
<LINE>sweet Benedick! God give me patience!'</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She doth indeed; my daughter says so: and the</LINE>
<LINE>ecstasy hath so much overborne her that my daughter</LINE>
<LINE>is sometime afeared she will do a desperate outrage</LINE>
<LINE>to herself: it is very true.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It were good that Benedick knew of it by some</LINE>
<LINE>other, if she will not discover it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To what end? He would make but a sport of it and</LINE>
<LINE>torment the poor lady worse.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>An he should, it were an alms to hang him. She's an</LINE>
<LINE>excellent sweet lady; and, out of all suspicion,</LINE>
<LINE>she is virtuous.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And she is exceeding wise.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In every thing but in loving Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, my lord, wisdom and blood combating in so tender</LINE>
<LINE>a body, we have ten proofs to one that blood hath</LINE>
<LINE>the victory. I am sorry for her, as I have just</LINE>
<LINE>cause, being her uncle and her guardian.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would she had bestowed this dotage on me: I would</LINE>
<LINE>have daffed all other respects and made her half</LINE>
<LINE>myself. I pray you, tell Benedick of it, and hear</LINE>
<LINE>what a' will say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Were it good, think you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hero thinks surely she will die; for she says she</LINE>
<LINE>will die, if he love her not, and she will die, ere</LINE>
<LINE>she make her love known, and she will die, if he woo</LINE>
<LINE>her, rather than she will bate one breath of her</LINE>
<LINE>accustomed crossness.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She doth well: if she should make tender of her</LINE>
<LINE>love, 'tis very possible he'll scorn it; for the</LINE>
<LINE>man, as you know all, hath a contemptible spirit.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is a very proper man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He hath indeed a good outward happiness.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Before God! and, in my mind, very wise.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He doth indeed show some sparks that are like wit.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And I take him to be valiant.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>As Hector, I assure you: and in the managing of</LINE>
<LINE>quarrels you may say he is wise; for either he</LINE>
<LINE>avoids them with great discretion, or undertakes</LINE>
<LINE>them with a most Christian-like fear.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he do fear God, a' must necessarily keep peace:</LINE>
<LINE>if he break the peace, he ought to enter into a</LINE>
<LINE>quarrel with fear and trembling.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And so will he do; for the man doth fear God,</LINE>
<LINE>howsoever it seems not in him by some large jests</LINE>
<LINE>he will make. Well I am sorry for your niece. Shall</LINE>
<LINE>we go seek Benedick, and tell him of her love?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Never tell him, my lord: let her wear it out with</LINE>
<LINE>good counsel.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, that's impossible: she may wear her heart out first.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, we will hear further of it by your daughter:</LINE>
<LINE>let it cool the while. I love Benedick well; and I</LINE>
<LINE>could wish he would modestly examine himself, to see</LINE>
<LINE>how much he is unworthy so good a lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, will you walk? dinner is ready.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he do not dote on her upon this, I will never</LINE>
<LINE>trust my expectation.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Let there be the same net spread for her; and that</LINE>
<LINE>must your daughter and her gentlewomen carry. The</LINE>
<LINE>sport will be, when they hold one an opinion of</LINE>
<LINE>another's dotage, and no such matter: that's the</LINE>
<LINE>scene that I would see, which will be merely a</LINE>
<LINE>dumb-show. Let us send her to call him in to dinner.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and LEONATO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Coming forward</STAGEDIR> This can be no trick: the</LINE>
<LINE>conference was sadly borne. They have the truth of</LINE>
<LINE>this from Hero. They seem to pity the lady: it</LINE>
<LINE>seems her affections have their full bent. Love me!</LINE>
<LINE>why, it must be requited. I hear how I am censured:</LINE>
<LINE>they say I will bear myself proudly, if I perceive</LINE>
<LINE>the love come from her; they say too that she will</LINE>
<LINE>rather die than give any sign of affection. I did</LINE>
<LINE>never think to marry: I must not seem proud: happy</LINE>
<LINE>are they that hear their detractions and can put</LINE>
<LINE>them to mending. They say the lady is fair; 'tis a</LINE>
<LINE>truth, I can bear them witness; and virtuous; 'tis</LINE>
<LINE>so, I cannot reprove it; and wise, but for loving</LINE>
<LINE>me; by my troth, it is no addition to her wit, nor</LINE>
<LINE>no great argument of her folly, for I will be</LINE>
<LINE>horribly in love with her. I may chance have some</LINE>
<LINE>odd quirks and remnants of wit broken on me,</LINE>
<LINE>because I have railed so long against marriage: but</LINE>
<LINE>doth not the appetite alter? a man loves the meat</LINE>
<LINE>in his youth that he cannot endure in his age.</LINE>
<LINE>Shall quips and sentences and these paper bullets of</LINE>
<LINE>the brain awe a man from the career of his humour?</LINE>
<LINE>No, the world must be peopled. When I said I would</LINE>
<LINE>die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I</LINE>
<LINE>were married. Here comes Beatrice. By this day!</LINE>
<LINE>she's a fair lady: I do spy some marks of love in</LINE>
<LINE>her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BEATRICE</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Against my will I am sent to bid you come in to dinner.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Fair Beatrice, I thank you for your pains.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I took no more pains for those thanks than you take</LINE>
<LINE>pains to thank me: if it had been painful, I would</LINE>
<LINE>not have come.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You take pleasure then in the message?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, just so much as you may take upon a knife's</LINE>
<LINE>point and choke a daw withal. You have no stomach,</LINE>
<LINE>signior: fare you well.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ha! 'Against my will I am sent to bid you come in</LINE>
<LINE>to dinner;' there's a double meaning in that 'I took</LINE>
<LINE>no more pains for those thanks than you took pains</LINE>
<LINE>to thank me.' that's as much as to say, Any pains</LINE>
<LINE>that I take for you is as easy as thanks. If I do</LINE>
<LINE>not take pity of her, I am a villain; if I do not</LINE>
<LINE>love her, I am a Jew. I will go get her picture.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
</ACT>
<ACT><TITLE>ACT III</TITLE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE I. LEONATO'S garden.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good Margaret, run thee to the parlor;</LINE>
<LINE>There shalt thou find my cousin Beatrice</LINE>
<LINE>Proposing with the prince and Claudio:</LINE>
<LINE>Whisper her ear and tell her, I and Ursula</LINE>
<LINE>Walk in the orchard and our whole discourse</LINE>
<LINE>Is all of her; say that thou overheard'st us;</LINE>
<LINE>And bid her steal into the pleached bower,</LINE>
<LINE>Where honeysuckles, ripen'd by the sun,</LINE>
<LINE>Forbid the sun to enter, like favourites,</LINE>
<LINE>Made proud by princes, that advance their pride</LINE>
<LINE>Against that power that bred it: there will she hide her,</LINE>
<LINE>To listen our purpose. This is thy office;</LINE>
<LINE>Bear thee well in it and leave us alone.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll make her come, I warrant you, presently.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, Ursula, when Beatrice doth come,</LINE>
<LINE>As we do trace this alley up and down,</LINE>
<LINE>Our talk must only be of Benedick.</LINE>
<LINE>When I do name him, let it be thy part</LINE>
<LINE>To praise him more than ever man did merit:</LINE>
<LINE>My talk to thee must be how Benedick</LINE>
<LINE>Is sick in love with Beatrice. Of this matter</LINE>
<LINE>Is little Cupid's crafty arrow made,</LINE>
<LINE>That only wounds by hearsay.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BEATRICE, behind</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Now begin;</LINE>
<LINE>For look where Beatrice, like a lapwing, runs</LINE>
<LINE>Close by the ground, to hear our conference.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish</LINE>
<LINE>Cut with her golden oars the silver stream,</LINE>
<LINE>And greedily devour the treacherous bait:</LINE>
<LINE>So angle we for Beatrice; who even now</LINE>
<LINE>Is couched in the woodbine coverture.</LINE>
<LINE>Fear you not my part of the dialogue.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Then go we near her, that her ear lose nothing</LINE>
<LINE>Of the false sweet bait that we lay for it.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Approaching the bower</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>No, truly, Ursula, she is too disdainful;</LINE>
<LINE>I know her spirits are as coy and wild</LINE>
<LINE>As haggerds of the rock.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But are you sure</LINE>
<LINE>That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So says the prince and my new-trothed lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And did they bid you tell her of it, madam?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>They did entreat me to acquaint her of it;</LINE>
<LINE>But I persuaded them, if they loved Benedick,</LINE>
<LINE>To wish him wrestle with affection,</LINE>
<LINE>And never to let Beatrice know of it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why did you so? Doth not the gentleman</LINE>
<LINE>Deserve as full as fortunate a bed</LINE>
<LINE>As ever Beatrice shall couch upon?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O god of love! I know he doth deserve</LINE>
<LINE>As much as may be yielded to a man:</LINE>
<LINE>But Nature never framed a woman's heart</LINE>
<LINE>Of prouder stuff than that of Beatrice;</LINE>
<LINE>Disdain and scorn ride sparkling in her eyes,</LINE>
<LINE>Misprising what they look on, and her wit</LINE>
<LINE>Values itself so highly that to her</LINE>
<LINE>All matter else seems weak: she cannot love,</LINE>
<LINE>Nor take no shape nor project of affection,</LINE>
<LINE>She is so self-endeared.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sure, I think so;</LINE>
<LINE>And therefore certainly it were not good</LINE>
<LINE>She knew his love, lest she make sport at it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, you speak truth. I never yet saw man,</LINE>
<LINE>How wise, how noble, young, how rarely featured,</LINE>
<LINE>But she would spell him backward: if fair-faced,</LINE>
<LINE>She would swear the gentleman should be her sister;</LINE>
<LINE>If black, why, Nature, drawing of an antique,</LINE>
<LINE>Made a foul blot; if tall, a lance ill-headed;</LINE>
<LINE>If low, an agate very vilely cut;</LINE>
<LINE>If speaking, why, a vane blown with all winds;</LINE>
<LINE>If silent, why, a block moved with none.</LINE>
<LINE>So turns she every man the wrong side out</LINE>
<LINE>And never gives to truth and virtue that</LINE>
<LINE>Which simpleness and merit purchaseth.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, not to be so odd and from all fashions</LINE>
<LINE>As Beatrice is, cannot be commendable:</LINE>
<LINE>But who dare tell her so? If I should speak,</LINE>
<LINE>She would mock me into air; O, she would laugh me</LINE>
<LINE>Out of myself, press me to death with wit.</LINE>
<LINE>Therefore let Benedick, like cover'd fire,</LINE>
<LINE>Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly:</LINE>
<LINE>It were a better death than die with mocks,</LINE>
<LINE>Which is as bad as die with tickling.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yet tell her of it: hear what she will say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No; rather I will go to Benedick</LINE>
<LINE>And counsel him to fight against his passion.</LINE>
<LINE>And, truly, I'll devise some honest slanders</LINE>
<LINE>To stain my cousin with: one doth not know</LINE>
<LINE>How much an ill word may empoison liking.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, do not do your cousin such a wrong.</LINE>
<LINE>She cannot be so much without true judgment--</LINE>
<LINE>Having so swift and excellent a wit</LINE>
<LINE>As she is prized to have--as to refuse</LINE>
<LINE>So rare a gentleman as Signior Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is the only man of Italy.</LINE>
<LINE>Always excepted my dear Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray you, be not angry with me, madam,</LINE>
<LINE>Speaking my fancy: Signior Benedick,</LINE>
<LINE>For shape, for bearing, argument and valour,</LINE>
<LINE>Goes foremost in report through Italy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Indeed, he hath an excellent good name.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>His excellence did earn it, ere he had it.</LINE>
<LINE>When are you married, madam?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, every day, to-morrow. Come, go in:</LINE>
<LINE>I'll show thee some attires, and have thy counsel</LINE>
<LINE>Which is the best to furnish me to-morrow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She's limed, I warrant you: we have caught her, madam.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If it proves so, then loving goes by haps:</LINE>
<LINE>Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt HERO and URSULA</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Coming forward</STAGEDIR></LINE>
<LINE>What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true?</LINE>
<LINE>Stand I condemn'd for pride and scorn so much?</LINE>
<LINE>Contempt, farewell! and maiden pride, adieu!</LINE>
<LINE>No glory lives behind the back of such.</LINE>
<LINE>And, Benedick, love on; I will requite thee,</LINE>
<LINE>Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand:</LINE>
<LINE>If thou dost love, my kindness shall incite thee</LINE>
<LINE>To bind our loves up in a holy band;</LINE>
<LINE>For others say thou dost deserve, and I</LINE>
<LINE>Believe it better than reportingly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE II. A room in LEONATO'S house</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, and LEONATO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I do but stay till your marriage be consummate, and</LINE>
<LINE>then go I toward Arragon.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll bring you thither, my lord, if you'll</LINE>
<LINE>vouchsafe me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, that would be as great a soil in the new gloss</LINE>
<LINE>of your marriage as to show a child his new coat</LINE>
<LINE>and forbid him to wear it. I will only be bold</LINE>
<LINE>with Benedick for his company; for, from the crown</LINE>
<LINE>of his head to the sole of his foot, he is all</LINE>
<LINE>mirth: he hath twice or thrice cut Cupid's</LINE>
<LINE>bow-string and the little hangman dare not shoot at</LINE>
<LINE>him; he hath a heart as sound as a bell and his</LINE>
<LINE>tongue is the clapper, for what his heart thinks his</LINE>
<LINE>tongue speaks.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Gallants, I am not as I have been.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So say I methinks you are sadder.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I hope he be in love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hang him, truant! there's no true drop of blood in</LINE>
<LINE>him, to be truly touched with love: if he be sad,</LINE>
<LINE>he wants money.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I have the toothache.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Draw it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hang it!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You must hang it first, and draw it afterwards.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What! sigh for the toothache?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Where is but a humour or a worm.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, every one can master a grief but he that has</LINE>
<LINE>it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yet say I, he is in love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There is no appearance of fancy in him, unless it be</LINE>
<LINE>a fancy that he hath to strange disguises; as, to be</LINE>
<LINE>a Dutchman today, a Frenchman to-morrow, or in the</LINE>
<LINE>shape of two countries at once, as, a German from</LINE>
<LINE>the waist downward, all slops, and a Spaniard from</LINE>
<LINE>the hip upward, no doublet. Unless he have a fancy</LINE>
<LINE>to this foolery, as it appears he hath, he is no</LINE>
<LINE>fool for fancy, as you would have it appear he is.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he be not in love with some woman, there is no</LINE>
<LINE>believing old signs: a' brushes his hat o'</LINE>
<LINE>mornings; what should that bode?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hath any man seen him at the barber's?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, but the barber's man hath been seen with him,</LINE>
<LINE>and the old ornament of his cheek hath already</LINE>
<LINE>stuffed tennis-balls.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Indeed, he looks younger than he did, by the loss of a beard.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, a' rubs himself with civet: can you smell him</LINE>
<LINE>out by that?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That's as much as to say, the sweet youth's in love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The greatest note of it is his melancholy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And when was he wont to wash his face?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, or to paint himself? for the which, I hear</LINE>
<LINE>what they say of him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, but his jesting spirit; which is now crept into</LINE>
<LINE>a lute-string and now governed by stops.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Indeed, that tells a heavy tale for him: conclude,</LINE>
<LINE>conclude he is in love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, but I know who loves him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That would I know too: I warrant, one that knows him not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, and his ill conditions; and, in despite of</LINE>
<LINE>all, dies for him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She shall be buried with her face upwards.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yet is this no charm for the toothache. Old</LINE>
<LINE>signior, walk aside with me: I have studied eight</LINE>
<LINE>or nine wise words to speak to you, which these</LINE>
<LINE>hobby-horses must not hear.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt BENEDICK and LEONATO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For my life, to break with him about Beatrice.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis even so. Hero and Margaret have by this</LINE>
<LINE>played their parts with Beatrice; and then the two</LINE>
<LINE>bears will not bite one another when they meet.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON JOHN</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord and brother, God save you!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good den, brother.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If your leisure served, I would speak with you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In private?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If it please you: yet Count Claudio may hear; for</LINE>
<LINE>what I would speak of concerns him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What's the matter?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>To CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR> Means your lordship to be married</LINE>
<LINE>to-morrow?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You know he does.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know not that, when he knows what I know.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If there be any impediment, I pray you discover it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You may think I love you not: let that appear</LINE>
<LINE>hereafter, and aim better at me by that I now will</LINE>
<LINE>manifest. For my brother, I think he holds you</LINE>
<LINE>well, and in dearness of heart hath holp to effect</LINE>
<LINE>your ensuing marriage;--surely suit ill spent and</LINE>
<LINE>labour ill bestowed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, what's the matter?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I came hither to tell you; and, circumstances</LINE>
<LINE>shortened, for she has been too long a talking of,</LINE>
<LINE>the lady is disloyal.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Who, Hero?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Even she; Leonato's Hero, your Hero, every man's Hero:</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Disloyal?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The word is too good to paint out her wickedness; I</LINE>
<LINE>could say she were worse: think you of a worse</LINE>
<LINE>title, and I will fit her to it. Wonder not till</LINE>
<LINE>further warrant: go but with me to-night, you shall</LINE>
<LINE>see her chamber-window entered, even the night</LINE>
<LINE>before her wedding-day: if you love her then,</LINE>
<LINE>to-morrow wed her; but it would better fit your honour</LINE>
<LINE>to change your mind.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>May this be so?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will not think it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you dare not trust that you see, confess not</LINE>
<LINE>that you know: if you will follow me, I will show</LINE>
<LINE>you enough; and when you have seen more and heard</LINE>
<LINE>more, proceed accordingly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If I see any thing to-night why I should not marry</LINE>
<LINE>her to-morrow in the congregation, where I should</LINE>
<LINE>wed, there will I shame her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And, as I wooed for thee to obtain her, I will join</LINE>
<LINE>with thee to disgrace her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will disparage her no farther till you are my</LINE>
<LINE>witnesses: bear it coldly but till midnight, and</LINE>
<LINE>let the issue show itself.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O day untowardly turned!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O mischief strangely thwarting!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O plague right well prevented! so will you say when</LINE>
<LINE>you have seen the sequel.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE III. A street.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DOGBERRY and VERGES with the Watch</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Are you good men and true?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, or else it were pity but they should suffer</LINE>
<LINE>salvation, body and soul.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, that were a punishment too good for them, if</LINE>
<LINE>they should have any allegiance in them, being</LINE>
<LINE>chosen for the prince's watch.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, give them their charge, neighbour Dogberry.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>First, who think you the most desertless man to be</LINE>
<LINE>constable?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hugh Otecake, sir, or George Seacole; for they can</LINE>
<LINE>write and read.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come hither, neighbour Seacole. God hath blessed</LINE>
<LINE>you with a good name: to be a well-favoured man is</LINE>
<LINE>the gift of fortune; but to write and read comes by nature.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Second Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Both which, master constable,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have: I knew it would be your answer. Well,</LINE>
<LINE>for your favour, sir, why, give God thanks, and make</LINE>
<LINE>no boast of it; and for your writing and reading,</LINE>
<LINE>let that appear when there is no need of such</LINE>
<LINE>vanity. You are thought here to be the most</LINE>
<LINE>senseless and fit man for the constable of the</LINE>
<LINE>watch; therefore bear you the lantern. This is your</LINE>
<LINE>charge: you shall comprehend all vagrom men; you are</LINE>
<LINE>to bid any man stand, in the prince's name.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Second Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How if a' will not stand?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then, take no note of him, but let him go; and</LINE>
<LINE>presently call the rest of the watch together and</LINE>
<LINE>thank God you are rid of a knave.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he will not stand when he is bidden, he is none</LINE>
<LINE>of the prince's subjects.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>True, and they are to meddle with none but the</LINE>
<LINE>prince's subjects. You shall also make no noise in</LINE>
<LINE>the streets; for, for the watch to babble and to</LINE>
<LINE>talk is most tolerable and not to be endured.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We will rather sleep than talk: we know what</LINE>
<LINE>belongs to a watch.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, you speak like an ancient and most quiet</LINE>
<LINE>watchman; for I cannot see how sleeping should</LINE>
<LINE>offend: only, have a care that your bills be not</LINE>
<LINE>stolen. Well, you are to call at all the</LINE>
<LINE>ale-houses, and bid those that are drunk get them to bed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How if they will not?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then, let them alone till they are sober: if</LINE>
<LINE>they make you not then the better answer, you may</LINE>
<LINE>say they are not the men you took them for.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, sir.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you meet a thief, you may suspect him, by virtue</LINE>
<LINE>of your office, to be no true man; and, for such</LINE>
<LINE>kind of men, the less you meddle or make with them,</LINE>
<LINE>why the more is for your honesty.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If we know him to be a thief, shall we not lay</LINE>
<LINE>hands on him?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Truly, by your office, you may; but I think they</LINE>
<LINE>that touch pitch will be defiled: the most peaceable</LINE>
<LINE>way for you, if you do take a thief, is to let him</LINE>
<LINE>show himself what he is and steal out of your company.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have been always called a merciful man, partner.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Truly, I would not hang a dog by my will, much more</LINE>
<LINE>a man who hath any honesty in him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you hear a child cry in the night, you must call</LINE>
<LINE>to the nurse and bid her still it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How if the nurse be asleep and will not hear us?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then, depart in peace, and let the child wake</LINE>
<LINE>her with crying; for the ewe that will not hear her</LINE>
<LINE>lamb when it baes will never answer a calf when he bleats.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis very true.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This is the end of the charge:--you, constable, are</LINE>
<LINE>to present the prince's own person: if you meet the</LINE>
<LINE>prince in the night, you may stay him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, by'r our lady, that I think a' cannot.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Five shillings to one on't, with any man that knows</LINE>
<LINE>the statutes, he may stay him: marry, not without</LINE>
<LINE>the prince be willing; for, indeed, the watch ought</LINE>
<LINE>to offend no man; and it is an offence to stay a</LINE>
<LINE>man against his will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By'r lady, I think it be so.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ha, ha, ha! Well, masters, good night: an there be</LINE>
<LINE>any matter of weight chances, call up me: keep your</LINE>
<LINE>fellows' counsels and your own; and good night.</LINE>
<LINE>Come, neighbour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, masters, we hear our charge: let us go sit here</LINE>
<LINE>upon the church-bench till two, and then all to bed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>One word more, honest neighbours. I pray you watch</LINE>
<LINE>about Signior Leonato's door; for the wedding being</LINE>
<LINE>there to-morrow, there is a great coil to-night.</LINE>
<LINE>Adieu: be vigitant, I beseech you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt DOGBERRY and VERGES</STAGEDIR>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BORACHIO and CONRADE</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What Conrade!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Aside</STAGEDIR> Peace! stir not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Conrade, I say!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Here, man; I am at thy elbow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Mass, and my elbow itched; I thought there would a</LINE>
<LINE>scab follow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will owe thee an answer for that: and now forward</LINE>
<LINE>with thy tale.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Stand thee close, then, under this pent-house, for</LINE>
<LINE>it drizzles rain; and I will, like a true drunkard,</LINE>
<LINE>utter all to thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Aside</STAGEDIR> Some treason, masters: yet stand close.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Therefore know I have earned of Don John a thousand ducats.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is it possible that any villany should be so dear?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou shouldst rather ask if it were possible any</LINE>
<LINE>villany should be so rich; for when rich villains</LINE>
<LINE>have need of poor ones, poor ones may make what</LINE>
<LINE>price they will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I wonder at it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That shows thou art unconfirmed. Thou knowest that</LINE>
<LINE>the fashion of a doublet, or a hat, or a cloak, is</LINE>
<LINE>nothing to a man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, it is apparel.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I mean, the fashion.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, the fashion is the fashion.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Tush! I may as well say the fool's the fool. But</LINE>
<LINE>seest thou not what a deformed thief this fashion</LINE>
<LINE>is?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Aside</STAGEDIR> I know that Deformed; a' has been a vile</LINE>
<LINE>thief this seven year; a' goes up and down like a</LINE>
<LINE>gentleman: I remember his name.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Didst thou not hear somebody?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No; 'twas the vane on the house.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Seest thou not, I say, what a deformed thief this</LINE>
<LINE>fashion is? how giddily a' turns about all the hot</LINE>
<LINE>bloods between fourteen and five-and-thirty?</LINE>
<LINE>sometimes fashioning them like Pharaoh's soldiers</LINE>
<LINE>in the reeky painting, sometime like god Bel's</LINE>
<LINE>priests in the old church-window, sometime like the</LINE>
<LINE>shaven Hercules in the smirched worm-eaten tapestry,</LINE>
<LINE>where his codpiece seems as massy as his club?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>All this I see; and I see that the fashion wears</LINE>
<LINE>out more apparel than the man. But art not thou</LINE>
<LINE>thyself giddy with the fashion too, that thou hast</LINE>
<LINE>shifted out of thy tale into telling me of the fashion?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not so, neither: but know that I have to-night</LINE>
<LINE>wooed Margaret, the Lady Hero's gentlewoman, by the</LINE>
<LINE>name of Hero: she leans me out at her mistress'</LINE>
<LINE>chamber-window, bids me a thousand times good</LINE>
<LINE>night,--I tell this tale vilely:--I should first</LINE>
<LINE>tell thee how the prince, Claudio and my master,</LINE>
<LINE>planted and placed and possessed by my master Don</LINE>
<LINE>John, saw afar off in the orchard this amiable encounter.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And thought they Margaret was Hero?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Two of them did, the prince and Claudio; but the</LINE>
<LINE>devil my master knew she was Margaret; and partly</LINE>
<LINE>by his oaths, which first possessed them, partly by</LINE>
<LINE>the dark night, which did deceive them, but chiefly</LINE>
<LINE>by my villany, which did confirm any slander that</LINE>
<LINE>Don John had made, away went Claudio enraged; swore</LINE>
<LINE>he would meet her, as he was appointed, next morning</LINE>
<LINE>at the temple, and there, before the whole</LINE>
<LINE>congregation, shame her with what he saw o'er night</LINE>
<LINE>and send her home again without a husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We charge you, in the prince's name, stand!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Second Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Call up the right master constable. We have here</LINE>
<LINE>recovered the most dangerous piece of lechery that</LINE>
<LINE>ever was known in the commonwealth.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And one Deformed is one of them: I know him; a'</LINE>
<LINE>wears a lock.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Masters, masters,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Second Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You'll be made bring Deformed forth, I warrant you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Masters,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Never speak: we charge you let us obey you to go with us.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We are like to prove a goodly commodity, being taken</LINE>
<LINE>up of these men's bills.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A commodity in question, I warrant you. Come, we'll obey you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE IV. HERO's apartment.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good Ursula, wake my cousin Beatrice, and desire</LINE>
<LINE>her to rise.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will, lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And bid her come hither.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Troth, I think your other rabato were better.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, pray thee, good Meg, I'll wear this.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, 's not so good; and I warrant your</LINE>
<LINE>cousin will say so.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My cousin's a fool, and thou art another: I'll wear</LINE>
<LINE>none but this.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I like the new tire within excellently, if the hair</LINE>
<LINE>were a thought browner; and your gown's a most rare</LINE>
<LINE>fashion, i' faith. I saw the Duchess of Milan's</LINE>
<LINE>gown that they praise so.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, that exceeds, they say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my troth, 's but a night-gown in respect of</LINE>
<LINE>yours: cloth o' gold, and cuts, and laced with</LINE>
<LINE>silver, set with pearls, down sleeves, side sleeves,</LINE>
<LINE>and skirts, round underborne with a bluish tinsel:</LINE>
<LINE>but for a fine, quaint, graceful and excellent</LINE>
<LINE>fashion, yours is worth ten on 't.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God give me joy to wear it! for my heart is</LINE>
<LINE>exceeding heavy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Twill be heavier soon by the weight of a man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Fie upon thee! art not ashamed?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Of what, lady? of speaking honourably? Is not</LINE>
<LINE>marriage honourable in a beggar? Is not your lord</LINE>
<LINE>honourable without marriage? I think you would have</LINE>
<LINE>me say, 'saving your reverence, a husband:' and bad</LINE>
<LINE>thinking do not wrest true speaking, I'll offend</LINE>
<LINE>nobody: is there any harm in 'the heavier for a</LINE>
<LINE>husband'? None, I think, and it be the right husband</LINE>
<LINE>and the right wife; otherwise 'tis light, and not</LINE>
<LINE>heavy: ask my Lady Beatrice else; here she comes.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BEATRICE</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, coz.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, sweet Hero.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why how now? do you speak in the sick tune?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am out of all other tune, methinks.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Clap's into 'Light o' love;' that goes without a</LINE>
<LINE>burden: do you sing it, and I'll dance it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ye light o' love, with your heels! then, if your</LINE>
<LINE>husband have stables enough, you'll see he shall</LINE>
<LINE>lack no barns.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O illegitimate construction! I scorn that with my heels.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis almost five o'clock, cousin; tis time you were</LINE>
<LINE>ready. By my troth, I am exceeding ill: heigh-ho!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For a hawk, a horse, or a husband?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For the letter that begins them all, H.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, and you be not turned Turk, there's no more</LINE>
<LINE>sailing by the star.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What means the fool, trow?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nothing I; but God send every one their heart's desire!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>These gloves the count sent me; they are an</LINE>
<LINE>excellent perfume.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am stuffed, cousin; I cannot smell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A maid, and stuffed! there's goodly catching of cold.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, God help me! God help me! how long have you</LINE>
<LINE>professed apprehension?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Even since you left it. Doth not my wit become me rarely?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is not seen enough, you should wear it in your</LINE>
<LINE>cap. By my troth, I am sick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Get you some of this distilled Carduus Benedictus,</LINE>
<LINE>and lay it to your heart: it is the only thing for a qualm.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There thou prickest her with a thistle.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Benedictus! why Benedictus? you have some moral in</LINE>
<LINE>this Benedictus.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Moral! no, by my troth, I have no moral meaning; I</LINE>
<LINE>meant, plain holy-thistle. You may think perchance</LINE>
<LINE>that I think you are in love: nay, by'r lady, I am</LINE>
<LINE>not such a fool to think what I list, nor I list</LINE>
<LINE>not to think what I can, nor indeed I cannot think,</LINE>
<LINE>if I would think my heart out of thinking, that you</LINE>
<LINE>are in love or that you will be in love or that you</LINE>
<LINE>can be in love. Yet Benedick was such another, and</LINE>
<LINE>now is he become a man: he swore he would never</LINE>
<LINE>marry, and yet now, in despite of his heart, he eats</LINE>
<LINE>his meat without grudging: and how you may be</LINE>
<LINE>converted I know not, but methinks you look with</LINE>
<LINE>your eyes as other women do.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What pace is this that thy tongue keeps?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not a false gallop.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter URSULA</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Madam, withdraw: the prince, the count, Signior</LINE>
<LINE>Benedick, Don John, and all the gallants of the</LINE>
<LINE>town, are come to fetch you to church.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Help to dress me, good coz, good Meg, good Ursula.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE V. Another room in LEONATO'S house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO, with DOGBERRY and VERGES</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What would you with me, honest neighbour?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you</LINE>
<LINE>that decerns you nearly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Brief, I pray you; for you see it is a busy time with me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, this it is, sir.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, in truth it is, sir.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What is it, my good friends?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the</LINE>
<LINE>matter: an old man, sir, and his wits are not so</LINE>
<LINE>blunt as, God help, I would desire they were; but,</LINE>
<LINE>in faith, honest as the skin between his brows.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yes, I thank God I am as honest as any man living</LINE>
<LINE>that is an old man and no honester than I.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Neighbours, you are tedious.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the</LINE>
<LINE>poor duke's officers; but truly, for mine own part,</LINE>
<LINE>if I were as tedious as a king, I could find it in</LINE>
<LINE>my heart to bestow it all of your worship.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>All thy tediousness on me, ah?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, an 'twere a thousand pound more than 'tis; for</LINE>
<LINE>I hear as good exclamation on your worship as of any</LINE>
<LINE>man in the city; and though I be but a poor man, I</LINE>
<LINE>am glad to hear it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And so am I.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would fain know what you have to say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your</LINE>
<LINE>worship's presence, ha' ta'en a couple of as arrant</LINE>
<LINE>knaves as any in Messina.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A good old man, sir; he will be talking: as they</LINE>
<LINE>say, when the age is in, the wit is out: God help</LINE>
<LINE>us! it is a world to see. Well said, i' faith,</LINE>
<LINE>neighbour Verges: well, God's a good man; an two men</LINE>
<LINE>ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest</LINE>
<LINE>soul, i' faith, sir; by my troth he is, as ever</LINE>
<LINE>broke bread; but God is to be worshipped; all men</LINE>
<LINE>are not alike; alas, good neighbour!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Gifts that God gives.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I must leave you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>One word, sir: our watch, sir, have indeed</LINE>
<LINE>comprehended two aspicious persons, and we would</LINE>
<LINE>have them this morning examined before your worship.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Take their examination yourself and bring it me: I</LINE>
<LINE>am now in great haste, as it may appear unto you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It shall be suffigance.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Drink some wine ere you go: fare you well.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter a Messenger</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, they stay for you to give your daughter to</LINE>
<LINE>her husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll wait upon them: I am ready.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt LEONATO and Messenger</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Go, good partner, go, get you to Francis Seacole;</LINE>
<LINE>bid him bring his pen and inkhorn to the gaol: we</LINE>
<LINE>are now to examination these men.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And we must do it wisely.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We will spare for no wit, I warrant you; here's</LINE>
<LINE>that shall drive some of them to a non-come: only</LINE>
<LINE>get the learned writer to set down our</LINE>
<LINE>excommunication and meet me at the gaol.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
</ACT>
<ACT><TITLE>ACT IV</TITLE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE I. A church.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, DON JOHN, LEONATO, FRIAR FRANCIS,
CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, HERO, BEATRICE, and Attendants</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, Friar Francis, be brief; only to the plain</LINE>
<LINE>form of marriage, and you shall recount their</LINE>
<LINE>particular duties afterwards.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You come hither, my lord, to marry this lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To be married to her: friar, you come to marry her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady, you come hither to be married to this count.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I do.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If either of you know any inward impediment why you</LINE>
<LINE>should not be conjoined, charge you, on your souls,</LINE>
<LINE>to utter it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Know you any, Hero?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>None, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Know you any, count?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I dare make his answer, none.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, what men dare do! what men may do! what men daily</LINE>
<LINE>do, not knowing what they do!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How now! interjections? Why, then, some be of</LINE>
<LINE>laughing, as, ah, ha, he!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Stand thee by, friar. Father, by your leave:</LINE>
<LINE>Will you with free and unconstrained soul</LINE>
<LINE>Give me this maid, your daughter?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>As freely, son, as God did give her me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And what have I to give you back, whose worth</LINE>
<LINE>May counterpoise this rich and precious gift?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nothing, unless you render her again.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sweet prince, you learn me noble thankfulness.</LINE>
<LINE>There, Leonato, take her back again:</LINE>
<LINE>Give not this rotten orange to your friend;</LINE>
<LINE>She's but the sign and semblance of her honour.</LINE>
<LINE>Behold how like a maid she blushes here!</LINE>
<LINE>O, what authority and show of truth</LINE>
<LINE>Can cunning sin cover itself withal!</LINE>
<LINE>Comes not that blood as modest evidence</LINE>
<LINE>To witness simple virtue? Would you not swear,</LINE>
<LINE>All you that see her, that she were a maid,</LINE>
<LINE>By these exterior shows? But she is none:</LINE>
<LINE>She knows the heat of a luxurious bed;</LINE>
<LINE>Her blush is guiltiness, not modesty.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What do you mean, my lord?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Not to be married,</LINE>
<LINE>Not to knit my soul to an approved wanton.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Dear my lord, if you, in your own proof,</LINE>
<LINE>Have vanquish'd the resistance of her youth,</LINE>
<LINE>And made defeat of her virginity,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know what you would say: if I have known her,</LINE>
<LINE>You will say she did embrace me as a husband,</LINE>
<LINE>And so extenuate the 'forehand sin:</LINE>
<LINE>No, Leonato,</LINE>
<LINE>I never tempted her with word too large;</LINE>
<LINE>But, as a brother to his sister, show'd</LINE>
<LINE>Bashful sincerity and comely love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And seem'd I ever otherwise to you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Out on thee! Seeming! I will write against it:</LINE>
<LINE>You seem to me as Dian in her orb,</LINE>
<LINE>As chaste as is the bud ere it be blown;</LINE>
<LINE>But you are more intemperate in your blood</LINE>
<LINE>Than Venus, or those pamper'd animals</LINE>
<LINE>That rage in savage sensuality.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is my lord well, that he doth speak so wide?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sweet prince, why speak not you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What should I speak?</LINE>
<LINE>I stand dishonour'd, that have gone about</LINE>
<LINE>To link my dear friend to a common stale.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Are these things spoken, or do I but dream?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sir, they are spoken, and these things are true.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This looks not like a nuptial.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>True! O God!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Leonato, stand I here?</LINE>
<LINE>Is this the prince? is this the prince's brother?</LINE>
<LINE>Is this face Hero's? are our eyes our own?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>All this is so: but what of this, my lord?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Let me but move one question to your daughter;</LINE>
<LINE>And, by that fatherly and kindly power</LINE>
<LINE>That you have in her, bid her answer truly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I charge thee do so, as thou art my child.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, God defend me! how am I beset!</LINE>
<LINE>What kind of catechising call you this?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To make you answer truly to your name.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is it not Hero? Who can blot that name</LINE>
<LINE>With any just reproach?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, that can Hero;</LINE>
<LINE>Hero itself can blot out Hero's virtue.</LINE>
<LINE>What man was he talk'd with you yesternight</LINE>
<LINE>Out at your window betwixt twelve and one?</LINE>
<LINE>Now, if you are a maid, answer to this.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I talk'd with no man at that hour, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then are you no maiden. Leonato,</LINE>
<LINE>I am sorry you must hear: upon mine honour,</LINE>
<LINE>Myself, my brother and this grieved count</LINE>
<LINE>Did see her, hear her, at that hour last night</LINE>
<LINE>Talk with a ruffian at her chamber-window</LINE>
<LINE>Who hath indeed, most like a liberal villain,</LINE>
<LINE>Confess'd the vile encounters they have had</LINE>
<LINE>A thousand times in secret.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Fie, fie! they are not to be named, my lord,</LINE>
<LINE>Not to be spoke of;</LINE>
<LINE>There is not chastity enough in language</LINE>
<LINE>Without offence to utter them. Thus, pretty lady,</LINE>
<LINE>I am sorry for thy much misgovernment.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O Hero, what a Hero hadst thou been,</LINE>
<LINE>If half thy outward graces had been placed</LINE>
<LINE>About thy thoughts and counsels of thy heart!</LINE>
<LINE>But fare thee well, most foul, most fair! farewell,</LINE>
<LINE>Thou pure impiety and impious purity!</LINE>
<LINE>For thee I'll lock up all the gates of love,</LINE>
<LINE>And on my eyelids shall conjecture hang,</LINE>
<LINE>To turn all beauty into thoughts of harm,</LINE>
<LINE>And never shall it more be gracious.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hath no man's dagger here a point for me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>HERO swoons</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, how now, cousin! wherefore sink you down?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON JOHN</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, let us go. These things, come thus to light,</LINE>
<LINE>Smother her spirits up.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt DON PEDRO, DON JOHN, and CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How doth the lady?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Dead, I think. Help, uncle!</LINE>
<LINE>Hero! why, Hero! Uncle! Signior Benedick! Friar!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O Fate! take not away thy heavy hand.</LINE>
<LINE>Death is the fairest cover for her shame</LINE>
<LINE>That may be wish'd for.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How now, cousin Hero!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Have comfort, lady.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Dost thou look up?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, wherefore should she not?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Wherefore! Why, doth not every earthly thing</LINE>
<LINE>Cry shame upon her? Could she here deny</LINE>
<LINE>The story that is printed in her blood?</LINE>
<LINE>Do not live, Hero; do not ope thine eyes:</LINE>
<LINE>For, did I think thou wouldst not quickly die,</LINE>
<LINE>Thought I thy spirits were stronger than thy shames,</LINE>
<LINE>Myself would, on the rearward of reproaches,</LINE>
<LINE>Strike at thy life. Grieved I, I had but one?</LINE>
<LINE>Chid I for that at frugal nature's frame?</LINE>
<LINE>O, one too much by thee! Why had I one?</LINE>
<LINE>Why ever wast thou lovely in my eyes?</LINE>
<LINE>Why had I not with charitable hand</LINE>
<LINE>Took up a beggar's issue at my gates,</LINE>
<LINE>Who smirch'd thus and mired with infamy,</LINE>
<LINE>I might have said 'No part of it is mine;</LINE>
<LINE>This shame derives itself from unknown loins'?</LINE>
<LINE>But mine and mine I loved and mine I praised</LINE>
<LINE>And mine that I was proud on, mine so much</LINE>
<LINE>That I myself was to myself not mine,</LINE>
<LINE>Valuing of her,--why, she, O, she is fallen</LINE>
<LINE>Into a pit of ink, that the wide sea</LINE>
<LINE>Hath drops too few to wash her clean again</LINE>
<LINE>And salt too little which may season give</LINE>
<LINE>To her foul-tainted flesh!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sir, sir, be patient.</LINE>
<LINE>For my part, I am so attired in wonder,</LINE>
<LINE>I know not what to say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, on my soul, my cousin is belied!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady, were you her bedfellow last night?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, truly not; although, until last night,</LINE>
<LINE>I have this twelvemonth been her bedfellow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Confirm'd, confirm'd! O, that is stronger made</LINE>
<LINE>Which was before barr'd up with ribs of iron!</LINE>
<LINE>Would the two princes lie, and Claudio lie,</LINE>
<LINE>Who loved her so, that, speaking of her foulness,</LINE>
<LINE>Wash'd it with tears? Hence from her! let her die.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hear me a little; for I have only been</LINE>
<LINE>Silent so long and given way unto</LINE>
<LINE>This course of fortune</LINE>
<LINE>By noting of the lady. I have mark'd</LINE>
<LINE>A thousand blushing apparitions</LINE>
<LINE>To start into her face, a thousand innocent shames</LINE>
<LINE>In angel whiteness beat away those blushes;</LINE>
<LINE>And in her eye there hath appear'd a fire,</LINE>
<LINE>To burn the errors that these princes hold</LINE>
<LINE>Against her maiden truth. Call me a fool;</LINE>
<LINE>Trust not my reading nor my observations,</LINE>
<LINE>Which with experimental seal doth warrant</LINE>
<LINE>The tenor of my book; trust not my age,</LINE>
<LINE>My reverence, calling, nor divinity,</LINE>
<LINE>If this sweet lady lie not guiltless here</LINE>
<LINE>Under some biting error.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Friar, it cannot be.</LINE>
<LINE>Thou seest that all the grace that she hath left</LINE>
<LINE>Is that she will not add to her damnation</LINE>
<LINE>A sin of perjury; she not denies it:</LINE>
<LINE>Why seek'st thou then to cover with excuse</LINE>
<LINE>That which appears in proper nakedness?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady, what man is he you are accused of?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>They know that do accuse me; I know none:</LINE>
<LINE>If I know more of any man alive</LINE>
<LINE>Than that which maiden modesty doth warrant,</LINE>
<LINE>Let all my sins lack mercy! O my father,</LINE>
<LINE>Prove you that any man with me conversed</LINE>
<LINE>At hours unmeet, or that I yesternight</LINE>
<LINE>Maintain'd the change of words with any creature,</LINE>
<LINE>Refuse me, hate me, torture me to death!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There is some strange misprision in the princes.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Two of them have the very bent of honour;</LINE>
<LINE>And if their wisdoms be misled in this,</LINE>
<LINE>The practise of it lives in John the bastard,</LINE>
<LINE>Whose spirits toil in frame of villanies.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know not. If they speak but truth of her,</LINE>
<LINE>These hands shall tear her; if they wrong her honour,</LINE>
<LINE>The proudest of them shall well hear of it.</LINE>
<LINE>Time hath not yet so dried this blood of mine,</LINE>
<LINE>Nor age so eat up my invention,</LINE>
<LINE>Nor fortune made such havoc of my means,</LINE>
<LINE>Nor my bad life reft me so much of friends,</LINE>
<LINE>But they shall find, awaked in such a kind,</LINE>
<LINE>Both strength of limb and policy of mind,</LINE>
<LINE>Ability in means and choice of friends,</LINE>
<LINE>To quit me of them throughly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Pause awhile,</LINE>
<LINE>And let my counsel sway you in this case.</LINE>
<LINE>Your daughter here the princes left for dead:</LINE>
<LINE>Let her awhile be secretly kept in,</LINE>
<LINE>And publish it that she is dead indeed;</LINE>
<LINE>Maintain a mourning ostentation</LINE>
<LINE>And on your family's old monument</LINE>
<LINE>Hang mournful epitaphs and do all rites</LINE>
<LINE>That appertain unto a burial.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What shall become of this? what will this do?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, this well carried shall on her behalf</LINE>
<LINE>Change slander to remorse; that is some good:</LINE>
<LINE>But not for that dream I on this strange course,</LINE>
<LINE>But on this travail look for greater birth.</LINE>
<LINE>She dying, as it must so be maintain'd,</LINE>
<LINE>Upon the instant that she was accused,</LINE>
<LINE>Shall be lamented, pitied and excused</LINE>
<LINE>Of every hearer: for it so falls out</LINE>
<LINE>That what we have we prize not to the worth</LINE>
<LINE>Whiles we enjoy it, but being lack'd and lost,</LINE>
<LINE>Why, then we rack the value, then we find</LINE>
<LINE>The virtue that possession would not show us</LINE>
<LINE>Whiles it was ours. So will it fare with Claudio:</LINE>
<LINE>When he shall hear she died upon his words,</LINE>
<LINE>The idea of her life shall sweetly creep</LINE>
<LINE>Into his study of imagination,</LINE>
<LINE>And every lovely organ of her life</LINE>
<LINE>Shall come apparell'd in more precious habit,</LINE>
<LINE>More moving-delicate and full of life,</LINE>
<LINE>Into the eye and prospect of his soul,</LINE>
<LINE>Than when she lived indeed; then shall he mourn,</LINE>
<LINE>If ever love had interest in his liver,</LINE>
<LINE>And wish he had not so accused her,</LINE>
<LINE>No, though he thought his accusation true.</LINE>
<LINE>Let this be so, and doubt not but success</LINE>
<LINE>Will fashion the event in better shape</LINE>
<LINE>Than I can lay it down in likelihood.</LINE>
<LINE>But if all aim but this be levell'd false,</LINE>
<LINE>The supposition of the lady's death</LINE>
<LINE>Will quench the wonder of her infamy:</LINE>
<LINE>And if it sort not well, you may conceal her,</LINE>
<LINE>As best befits her wounded reputation,</LINE>
<LINE>In some reclusive and religious life,</LINE>
<LINE>Out of all eyes, tongues, minds and injuries.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Signior Leonato, let the friar advise you:</LINE>
<LINE>And though you know my inwardness and love</LINE>
<LINE>Is very much unto the prince and Claudio,</LINE>
<LINE>Yet, by mine honour, I will deal in this</LINE>
<LINE>As secretly and justly as your soul</LINE>
<LINE>Should with your body.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Being that I flow in grief,</LINE>
<LINE>The smallest twine may lead me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis well consented: presently away;</LINE>
<LINE>For to strange sores strangely they strain the cure.</LINE>
<LINE>Come, lady, die to live: this wedding-day</LINE>
<LINE>Perhaps is but prolong'd: have patience and endure.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt all but BENEDICK and BEATRICE</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, and I will weep a while longer.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will not desire that.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have no reason; I do it freely.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Surely I do believe your fair cousin is wronged.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ah, how much might the man deserve of me that would right her!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is there any way to show such friendship?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A very even way, but no such friend.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>May a man do it?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is a man's office, but not yours.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is</LINE>
<LINE>not that strange?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>As strange as the thing I know not. It were as</LINE>
<LINE>possible for me to say I loved nothing so well as</LINE>
<LINE>you: but believe me not; and yet I lie not; I</LINE>
<LINE>confess nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my cousin.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my sword, Beatrice, thou lovest me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do not swear, and eat it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will swear by it that you love me; and I will make</LINE>
<LINE>him eat it that says I love not you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will you not eat your word?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>With no sauce that can be devised to it. I protest</LINE>
<LINE>I love thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then, God forgive me!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What offence, sweet Beatrice?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You have stayed me in a happy hour: I was about to</LINE>
<LINE>protest I loved you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And do it with all thy heart.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I love you with so much of my heart that none is</LINE>
<LINE>left to protest.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, bid me do any thing for thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Kill Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Ha! not for the wide world.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You kill me to deny it. Farewell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Tarry, sweet Beatrice.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am gone, though I am here: there is no love in</LINE>
<LINE>you: nay, I pray you, let me go.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Beatrice,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In faith, I will go.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We'll be friends first.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You dare easier be friends with me than fight with mine enemy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is Claudio thine enemy?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is he not approved in the height a villain, that</LINE>
<LINE>hath slandered, scorned, dishonoured my kinswoman? O</LINE>
<LINE>that I were a man! What, bear her in hand until they</LINE>
<LINE>come to take hands; and then, with public</LINE>
<LINE>accusation, uncovered slander, unmitigated rancour,</LINE>
<LINE>--O God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart</LINE>
<LINE>in the market-place.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hear me, Beatrice,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Talk with a man out at a window! A proper saying!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, but, Beatrice,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sweet Hero! She is wronged, she is slandered, she is undone.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Beat--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Princes and counties! Surely, a princely testimony,</LINE>
<LINE>a goodly count, Count Comfect; a sweet gallant,</LINE>
<LINE>surely! O that I were a man for his sake! or that I</LINE>
<LINE>had any friend would be a man for my sake! But</LINE>
<LINE>manhood is melted into courtesies, valour into</LINE>
<LINE>compliment, and men are only turned into tongue, and</LINE>
<LINE>trim ones too: he is now as valiant as Hercules</LINE>
<LINE>that only tells a lie and swears it. I cannot be a</LINE>
<LINE>man with wishing, therefore I will die a woman with grieving.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Tarry, good Beatrice. By this hand, I love thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Use it for my love some other way than swearing by it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Think you in your soul the Count Claudio hath wronged Hero?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, as sure as I have a thought or a soul.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Enough, I am engaged; I will challenge him. I will</LINE>
<LINE>kiss your hand, and so I leave you. By this hand,</LINE>
<LINE>Claudio shall render me a dear account. As you</LINE>
<LINE>hear of me, so think of me. Go, comfort your</LINE>
<LINE>cousin: I must say she is dead: and so, farewell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE II. A prison.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DOGBERRY, VERGES, and Sexton, in gowns; and
the Watch, with CONRADE and BORACHIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is our whole dissembly appeared?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, a stool and a cushion for the sexton.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Which be the malefactors?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, that am I and my partner.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, that's certain; we have the exhibition to examine.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But which are the offenders that are to be</LINE>
<LINE>examined? let them come before master constable.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, marry, let them come before me. What is your</LINE>
<LINE>name, friend?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Borachio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Pray, write down, Borachio. Yours, sirrah?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I am a gentleman, sir, and my name is Conrade.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Write down, master gentleman Conrade. Masters, do</LINE>
<LINE>you serve God?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, sir, we hope.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Write down, that they hope they serve God: and</LINE>
<LINE>write God first; for God defend but God should go</LINE>
<LINE>before such villains! Masters, it is proved already</LINE>
<LINE>that you are little better than false knaves; and it</LINE>
<LINE>will go near to be thought so shortly. How answer</LINE>
<LINE>you for yourselves?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, sir, we say we are none.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A marvellous witty fellow, I assure you: but I</LINE>
<LINE>will go about with him. Come you hither, sirrah; a</LINE>
<LINE>word in your ear: sir, I say to you, it is thought</LINE>
<LINE>you are false knaves.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sir, I say to you we are none.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, stand aside. 'Fore God, they are both in a</LINE>
<LINE>tale. Have you writ down, that they are none?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Master constable, you go not the way to examine:</LINE>
<LINE>you must call forth the watch that are their accusers.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, marry, that's the eftest way. Let the watch</LINE>
<LINE>come forth. Masters, I charge you, in the prince's</LINE>
<LINE>name, accuse these men.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This man said, sir, that Don John, the prince's</LINE>
<LINE>brother, was a villain.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Write down Prince John a villain. Why, this is flat</LINE>
<LINE>perjury, to call a prince's brother villain.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Master constable,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Pray thee, fellow, peace: I do not like thy look,</LINE>
<LINE>I promise thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What heard you him say else?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Second Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, that he had received a thousand ducats of</LINE>
<LINE>Don John for accusing the Lady Hero wrongfully.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Flat burglary as ever was committed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, by mass, that it is.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What else, fellow?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>First Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And that Count Claudio did mean, upon his words, to</LINE>
<LINE>disgrace Hero before the whole assembly. and not marry her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O villain! thou wilt be condemned into everlasting</LINE>
<LINE>redemption for this.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What else?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Watchman</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This is all.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Sexton</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And this is more, masters, than you can deny.</LINE>
<LINE>Prince John is this morning secretly stolen away;</LINE>
<LINE>Hero was in this manner accused, in this very manner</LINE>
<LINE>refused, and upon the grief of this suddenly died.</LINE>
<LINE>Master constable, let these men be bound, and</LINE>
<LINE>brought to Leonato's: I will go before and show</LINE>
<LINE>him their examination.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, let them be opinioned.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Let them be in the hands--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Off, coxcomb!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God's my life, where's the sexton? let him write</LINE>
<LINE>down the prince's officer coxcomb. Come, bind them.</LINE>
<LINE>Thou naughty varlet!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CONRADE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Away! you are an ass, you are an ass.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Dost thou not suspect my place? dost thou not</LINE>
<LINE>suspect my years? O that he were here to write me</LINE>
<LINE>down an ass! But, masters, remember that I am an</LINE>
<LINE>ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not</LINE>
<LINE>that I am an ass. No, thou villain, thou art full of</LINE>
<LINE>piety, as shall be proved upon thee by good witness.</LINE>
<LINE>I am a wise fellow, and, which is more, an officer,</LINE>
<LINE>and, which is more, a householder, and, which is</LINE>
<LINE>more, as pretty a piece of flesh as any is in</LINE>
<LINE>Messina, and one that knows the law, go to; and a</LINE>
<LINE>rich fellow enough, go to; and a fellow that hath</LINE>
<LINE>had losses, and one that hath two gowns and every</LINE>
<LINE>thing handsome about him. Bring him away. O that</LINE>
<LINE>I had been writ down an ass!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
</ACT>
<ACT><TITLE>ACT V</TITLE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE I. Before LEONATO'S house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO and ANTONIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you go on thus, you will kill yourself:</LINE>
<LINE>And 'tis not wisdom thus to second grief</LINE>
<LINE>Against yourself.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray thee, cease thy counsel,</LINE>
<LINE>Which falls into mine ears as profitless</LINE>
<LINE>As water in a sieve: give not me counsel;</LINE>
<LINE>Nor let no comforter delight mine ear</LINE>
<LINE>But such a one whose wrongs do suit with mine.</LINE>
<LINE>Bring me a father that so loved his child,</LINE>
<LINE>Whose joy of her is overwhelm'd like mine,</LINE>
<LINE>And bid him speak of patience;</LINE>
<LINE>Measure his woe the length and breadth of mine</LINE>
<LINE>And let it answer every strain for strain,</LINE>
<LINE>As thus for thus and such a grief for such,</LINE>
<LINE>In every lineament, branch, shape, and form:</LINE>
<LINE>If such a one will smile and stroke his beard,</LINE>
<LINE>Bid sorrow wag, cry 'hem!' when he should groan,</LINE>
<LINE>Patch grief with proverbs, make misfortune drunk</LINE>
<LINE>With candle-wasters; bring him yet to me,</LINE>
<LINE>And I of him will gather patience.</LINE>
<LINE>But there is no such man: for, brother, men</LINE>
<LINE>Can counsel and speak comfort to that grief</LINE>
<LINE>Which they themselves not feel; but, tasting it,</LINE>
<LINE>Their counsel turns to passion, which before</LINE>
<LINE>Would give preceptial medicine to rage,</LINE>
<LINE>Fetter strong madness in a silken thread,</LINE>
<LINE>Charm ache with air and agony with words:</LINE>
<LINE>No, no; 'tis all men's office to speak patience</LINE>
<LINE>To those that wring under the load of sorrow,</LINE>
<LINE>But no man's virtue nor sufficiency</LINE>
<LINE>To be so moral when he shall endure</LINE>
<LINE>The like himself. Therefore give me no counsel:</LINE>
<LINE>My griefs cry louder than advertisement.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Therein do men from children nothing differ.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I pray thee, peace. I will be flesh and blood;</LINE>
<LINE>For there was never yet philosopher</LINE>
<LINE>That could endure the toothache patiently,</LINE>
<LINE>However they have writ the style of gods</LINE>
<LINE>And made a push at chance and sufferance.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yet bend not all the harm upon yourself;</LINE>
<LINE>Make those that do offend you suffer too.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There thou speak'st reason: nay, I will do so.</LINE>
<LINE>My soul doth tell me Hero is belied;</LINE>
<LINE>And that shall Claudio know; so shall the prince</LINE>
<LINE>And all of them that thus dishonour her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Here comes the prince and Claudio hastily.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO and CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good den, good den.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good day to both of you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hear you. my lords,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We have some haste, Leonato.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Some haste, my lord! well, fare you well, my lord:</LINE>
<LINE>Are you so hasty now? well, all is one.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, do not quarrel with us, good old man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he could right himself with quarreling,</LINE>
<LINE>Some of us would lie low.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Who wrongs him?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, thou dost wrong me; thou dissembler, thou:--</LINE>
<LINE>Nay, never lay thy hand upon thy sword;</LINE>
<LINE>I fear thee not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, beshrew my hand,</LINE>
<LINE>If it should give your age such cause of fear:</LINE>
<LINE>In faith, my hand meant nothing to my sword.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Tush, tush, man; never fleer and jest at me:</LINE>
<LINE>I speak not like a dotard nor a fool,</LINE>
<LINE>As under privilege of age to brag</LINE>
<LINE>What I have done being young, or what would do</LINE>
<LINE>Were I not old. Know, Claudio, to thy head,</LINE>
<LINE>Thou hast so wrong'd mine innocent child and me</LINE>
<LINE>That I am forced to lay my reverence by</LINE>
<LINE>And, with grey hairs and bruise of many days,</LINE>
<LINE>Do challenge thee to trial of a man.</LINE>
<LINE>I say thou hast belied mine innocent child;</LINE>
<LINE>Thy slander hath gone through and through her heart,</LINE>
<LINE>And she lies buried with her ancestors;</LINE>
<LINE>O, in a tomb where never scandal slept,</LINE>
<LINE>Save this of hers, framed by thy villany!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My villany?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thine, Claudio; thine, I say.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>You say not right, old man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, my lord,</LINE>
<LINE>I'll prove it on his body, if he dare,</LINE>
<LINE>Despite his nice fence and his active practise,</LINE>
<LINE>His May of youth and bloom of lustihood.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Away! I will not have to do with you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Canst thou so daff me? Thou hast kill'd my child:</LINE>
<LINE>If thou kill'st me, boy, thou shalt kill a man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He shall kill two of us, and men indeed:</LINE>
<LINE>But that's no matter; let him kill one first;</LINE>
<LINE>Win me and wear me; let him answer me.</LINE>
<LINE>Come, follow me, boy; come, sir boy, come, follow me:</LINE>
<LINE>Sir boy, I'll whip you from your foining fence;</LINE>
<LINE>Nay, as I am a gentleman, I will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Brother,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Content yourself. God knows I loved my niece;</LINE>
<LINE>And she is dead, slander'd to death by villains,</LINE>
<LINE>That dare as well answer a man indeed</LINE>
<LINE>As I dare take a serpent by the tongue:</LINE>
<LINE>Boys, apes, braggarts, Jacks, milksops!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Brother Antony,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hold you content. What, man! I know them, yea,</LINE>
<LINE>And what they weigh, even to the utmost scruple,--</LINE>
<LINE>Scrambling, out-facing, fashion-monging boys,</LINE>
<LINE>That lie and cog and flout, deprave and slander,</LINE>
<LINE>Go anticly, show outward hideousness,</LINE>
<LINE>And speak off half a dozen dangerous words,</LINE>
<LINE>How they might hurt their enemies, if they durst;</LINE>
<LINE>And this is all.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But, brother Antony,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, 'tis no matter:</LINE>
<LINE>Do not you meddle; let me deal in this.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Gentlemen both, we will not wake your patience.</LINE>
<LINE>My heart is sorry for your daughter's death:</LINE>
<LINE>But, on my honour, she was charged with nothing</LINE>
<LINE>But what was true and very full of proof.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, my lord,--</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will not hear you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No? Come, brother; away! I will be heard.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And shall, or some of us will smart for it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt LEONATO and ANTONIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>See, see; here comes the man we went to seek.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BENEDICK</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, signior, what news?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good day, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Welcome, signior: you are almost come to part</LINE>
<LINE>almost a fray.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We had like to have had our two noses snapped off</LINE>
<LINE>with two old men without teeth.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Leonato and his brother. What thinkest thou? Had</LINE>
<LINE>we fought, I doubt we should have been too young for them.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In a false quarrel there is no true valour. I came</LINE>
<LINE>to seek you both.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We have been up and down to seek thee; for we are</LINE>
<LINE>high-proof melancholy and would fain have it beaten</LINE>
<LINE>away. Wilt thou use thy wit?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is in my scabbard: shall I draw it?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Never any did so, though very many have been beside</LINE>
<LINE>their wit. I will bid thee draw, as we do the</LINE>
<LINE>minstrels; draw, to pleasure us.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>As I am an honest man, he looks pale. Art thou</LINE>
<LINE>sick, or angry?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What, courage, man! What though care killed a cat,</LINE>
<LINE>thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, and you</LINE>
<LINE>charge it against me. I pray you choose another subject.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nay, then, give him another staff: this last was</LINE>
<LINE>broke cross.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By this light, he changes more and more: I think</LINE>
<LINE>he be angry indeed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Shall I speak a word in your ear?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God bless me from a challenge!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Aside to CLAUDIO</STAGEDIR> You are a villain; I jest not:</LINE>
<LINE>I will make it good how you dare, with what you</LINE>
<LINE>dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will</LINE>
<LINE>protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet</LINE>
<LINE>lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me</LINE>
<LINE>hear from you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, I will meet you, so I may have good cheer.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What, a feast, a feast?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I' faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a calf's</LINE>
<LINE>head and a capon; the which if I do not carve most</LINE>
<LINE>curiously, say my knife's naught. Shall I not find</LINE>
<LINE>a woodcock too?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the</LINE>
<LINE>other day. I said, thou hadst a fine wit: 'True,'</LINE>
<LINE>said she, 'a fine little one.' 'No,' said I, 'a</LINE>
<LINE>great wit:' 'Right,' says she, 'a great gross one.'</LINE>
<LINE>'Nay,' said I, 'a good wit:' 'Just,' said she, 'it</LINE>
<LINE>hurts nobody.' 'Nay,' said I, 'the gentleman</LINE>
<LINE>is wise:' 'Certain,' said she, 'a wise gentleman.'</LINE>
<LINE>'Nay,' said I, 'he hath the tongues:' 'That I</LINE>
<LINE>believe,' said she, 'for he swore a thing to me on</LINE>
<LINE>Monday night, which he forswore on Tuesday morning;</LINE>
<LINE>there's a double tongue; there's two tongues.' Thus</LINE>
<LINE>did she, an hour together, transshape thy particular</LINE>
<LINE>virtues: yet at last she concluded with a sigh, thou</LINE>
<LINE>wast the properest man in Italy.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For the which she wept heartily and said she cared</LINE>
<LINE>not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, that she did: but yet, for all that, an if she</LINE>
<LINE>did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly:</LINE>
<LINE>the old man's daughter told us all.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>All, all; and, moreover, God saw him when he was</LINE>
<LINE>hid in the garden.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But when shall we set the savage bull's horns on</LINE>
<LINE>the sensible Benedick's head?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, and text underneath, 'Here dwells Benedick the</LINE>
<LINE>married man'?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Fare you well, boy: you know my mind. I will leave</LINE>
<LINE>you now to your gossip-like humour: you break jests</LINE>
<LINE>as braggarts do their blades, which God be thanked,</LINE>
<LINE>hurt not. My lord, for your many courtesies I thank</LINE>
<LINE>you: I must discontinue your company: your brother</LINE>
<LINE>the bastard is fled from Messina: you have among</LINE>
<LINE>you killed a sweet and innocent lady. For my Lord</LINE>
<LINE>Lackbeard there, he and I shall meet: and, till</LINE>
<LINE>then, peace be with him.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is in earnest.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In most profound earnest; and, I'll warrant you, for</LINE>
<LINE>the love of Beatrice.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And hath challenged thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Most sincerely.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his</LINE>
<LINE>doublet and hose and leaves off his wit!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape a</LINE>
<LINE>doctor to such a man.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But, soft you, let me be: pluck up, my heart, and</LINE>
<LINE>be sad. Did he not say, my brother was fled?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DOGBERRY, VERGES, and the Watch, with CONRADE
and BORACHIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come you, sir: if justice cannot tame you, she</LINE>
<LINE>shall ne'er weigh more reasons in her balance: nay,</LINE>
<LINE>an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be looked to.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How now? two of my brother's men bound! Borachio</LINE>
<LINE>one!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Hearken after their offence, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Officers, what offence have these men done?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Marry, sir, they have committed false report;</LINE>
<LINE>moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily,</LINE>
<LINE>they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have</LINE>
<LINE>belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust</LINE>
<LINE>things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I</LINE>
<LINE>ask thee what's their offence; sixth and lastly, why</LINE>
<LINE>they are committed; and, to conclude, what you lay</LINE>
<LINE>to their charge.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Rightly reasoned, and in his own division: and, by</LINE>
<LINE>my troth, there's one meaning well suited.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Who have you offended, masters, that you are thus</LINE>
<LINE>bound to your answer? this learned constable is</LINE>
<LINE>too cunning to be understood: what's your offence?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sweet prince, let me go no farther to mine answer:</LINE>
<LINE>do you hear me, and let this count kill me. I have</LINE>
<LINE>deceived even your very eyes: what your wisdoms</LINE>
<LINE>could not discover, these shallow fools have brought</LINE>
<LINE>to light: who in the night overheard me confessing</LINE>
<LINE>to this man how Don John your brother incensed me</LINE>
<LINE>to slander the Lady Hero, how you were brought into</LINE>
<LINE>the orchard and saw me court Margaret in Hero's</LINE>
<LINE>garments, how you disgraced her, when you should</LINE>
<LINE>marry her: my villany they have upon record; which</LINE>
<LINE>I had rather seal with my death than repeat over</LINE>
<LINE>to my shame. The lady is dead upon mine and my</LINE>
<LINE>master's false accusation; and, briefly, I desire</LINE>
<LINE>nothing but the reward of a villain.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Runs not this speech like iron through your blood?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I have drunk poison whiles he utter'd it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>But did my brother set thee on to this?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, and paid me richly for the practise of it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>He is composed and framed of treachery:</LINE>
<LINE>And fled he is upon this villany.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Sweet Hero! now thy image doth appear</LINE>
<LINE>In the rare semblance that I loved it first.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, bring away the plaintiffs: by this time our</LINE>
<LINE>sexton hath reformed Signior Leonato of the matter:</LINE>
<LINE>and, masters, do not forget to specify, when time</LINE>
<LINE>and place shall serve, that I am an ass.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>VERGES</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Here, here comes master Signior Leonato, and the</LINE>
<LINE>Sexton too.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter LEONATO and ANTONIO, with the Sexton</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Which is the villain? let me see his eyes,</LINE>
<LINE>That, when I note another man like him,</LINE>
<LINE>I may avoid him: which of these is he?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you would know your wronger, look on me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Art thou the slave that with thy breath hast kill'd</LINE>
<LINE>Mine innocent child?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, even I alone.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, not so, villain; thou beliest thyself:</LINE>
<LINE>Here stand a pair of honourable men;</LINE>
<LINE>A third is fled, that had a hand in it.</LINE>
<LINE>I thank you, princes, for my daughter's death:</LINE>
<LINE>Record it with your high and worthy deeds:</LINE>
<LINE>'Twas bravely done, if you bethink you of it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I know not how to pray your patience;</LINE>
<LINE>Yet I must speak. Choose your revenge yourself;</LINE>
<LINE>Impose me to what penance your invention</LINE>
<LINE>Can lay upon my sin: yet sinn'd I not</LINE>
<LINE>But in mistaking.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>By my soul, nor I:</LINE>
<LINE>And yet, to satisfy this good old man,</LINE>
<LINE>I would bend under any heavy weight</LINE>
<LINE>That he'll enjoin me to.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I cannot bid you bid my daughter live;</LINE>
<LINE>That were impossible: but, I pray you both,</LINE>
<LINE>Possess the people in Messina here</LINE>
<LINE>How innocent she died; and if your love</LINE>
<LINE>Can labour ought in sad invention,</LINE>
<LINE>Hang her an epitaph upon her tomb</LINE>
<LINE>And sing it to her bones, sing it to-night:</LINE>
<LINE>To-morrow morning come you to my house,</LINE>
<LINE>And since you could not be my son-in-law,</LINE>
<LINE>Be yet my nephew: my brother hath a daughter,</LINE>
<LINE>Almost the copy of my child that's dead,</LINE>
<LINE>And she alone is heir to both of us:</LINE>
<LINE>Give her the right you should have given her cousin,</LINE>
<LINE>And so dies my revenge.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O noble sir,</LINE>
<LINE>Your over-kindness doth wring tears from me!</LINE>
<LINE>I do embrace your offer; and dispose</LINE>
<LINE>For henceforth of poor Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To-morrow then I will expect your coming;</LINE>
<LINE>To-night I take my leave. This naughty man</LINE>
<LINE>Shall face to face be brought to Margaret,</LINE>
<LINE>Who I believe was pack'd in all this wrong,</LINE>
<LINE>Hired to it by your brother.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BORACHIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, by my soul, she was not,</LINE>
<LINE>Nor knew not what she did when she spoke to me,</LINE>
<LINE>But always hath been just and virtuous</LINE>
<LINE>In any thing that I do know by her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Moreover, sir, which indeed is not under white and</LINE>
<LINE>black, this plaintiff here, the offender, did call</LINE>
<LINE>me ass: I beseech you, let it be remembered in his</LINE>
<LINE>punishment. And also, the watch heard them talk of</LINE>
<LINE>one Deformed: they say be wears a key in his ear and</LINE>
<LINE>a lock hanging by it, and borrows money in God's</LINE>
<LINE>name, the which he hath used so long and never paid</LINE>
<LINE>that now men grow hard-hearted and will lend nothing</LINE>
<LINE>for God's sake: pray you, examine him upon that point.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I thank thee for thy care and honest pains.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Your worship speaks like a most thankful and</LINE>
<LINE>reverend youth; and I praise God for you.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>There's for thy pains.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>God save the foundation!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Go, I discharge thee of thy prisoner, and I thank thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DOGBERRY</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I leave an arrant knave with your worship; which I</LINE>
<LINE>beseech your worship to correct yourself, for the</LINE>
<LINE>example of others. God keep your worship! I wish</LINE>
<LINE>your worship well; God restore you to health! I</LINE>
<LINE>humbly give you leave to depart; and if a merry</LINE>
<LINE>meeting may be wished, God prohibit it! Come, neighbour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt DOGBERRY and VERGES</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Until to-morrow morning, lords, farewell.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Farewell, my lords: we look for you to-morrow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We will not fail.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To-night I'll mourn with Hero.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>To the Watch</STAGEDIR> Bring you these fellows on. We'll</LINE>
<LINE>talk with Margaret,</LINE>
<LINE>How her acquaintance grew with this lewd fellow.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt, severally</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE II. LEONATO'S garden.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BENEDICK and MARGARET, meeting</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Pray thee, sweet Mistress Margaret, deserve well at</LINE>
<LINE>my hands by helping me to the speech of Beatrice.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will you then write me a sonnet in praise of my beauty?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In so high a style, Margaret, that no man living</LINE>
<LINE>shall come over it; for, in most comely truth, thou</LINE>
<LINE>deservest it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To have no man come over me! why, shall I always</LINE>
<LINE>keep below stairs?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thy wit is as quick as the greyhound's mouth; it catches.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And yours as blunt as the fencer's foils, which hit,</LINE>
<LINE>but hurt not.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A most manly wit, Margaret; it will not hurt a</LINE>
<LINE>woman: and so, I pray thee, call Beatrice: I give</LINE>
<LINE>thee the bucklers.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Give us the swords; we have bucklers of our own.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>If you use them, Margaret, you must put in the</LINE>
<LINE>pikes with a vice; and they are dangerous weapons for maids.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>MARGARET</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who I think hath legs.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And therefore will come.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Exit MARGARET</STAGEDIR>
<STAGEDIR>Sings</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>The god of love,</LINE>
<LINE>That sits above,</LINE>
<LINE>And knows me, and knows me,</LINE>
<LINE>How pitiful I deserve,--</LINE>
<LINE>I mean in singing; but in loving, Leander the good</LINE>
<LINE>swimmer, Troilus the first employer of panders, and</LINE>
<LINE>a whole bookful of these quondam carpet-mangers,</LINE>
<LINE>whose names yet run smoothly in the even road of a</LINE>
<LINE>blank verse, why, they were never so truly turned</LINE>
<LINE>over and over as my poor self in love. Marry, I</LINE>
<LINE>cannot show it in rhyme; I have tried: I can find</LINE>
<LINE>out no rhyme to 'lady' but 'baby,' an innocent</LINE>
<LINE>rhyme; for 'scorn,' 'horn,' a hard rhyme; for,</LINE>
<LINE>'school,' 'fool,' a babbling rhyme; very ominous</LINE>
<LINE>endings: no, I was not born under a rhyming planet,</LINE>
<LINE>nor I cannot woo in festival terms.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter BEATRICE</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Sweet Beatrice, wouldst thou come when I called thee?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Yea, signior, and depart when you bid me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>O, stay but till then!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Then' is spoken; fare you well now: and yet, ere</LINE>
<LINE>I go, let me go with that I came; which is, with</LINE>
<LINE>knowing what hath passed between you and Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Only foul words; and thereupon I will kiss thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Foul words is but foul wind, and foul wind is but</LINE>
<LINE>foul breath, and foul breath is noisome; therefore I</LINE>
<LINE>will depart unkissed.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou hast frighted the word out of his right sense,</LINE>
<LINE>so forcible is thy wit. But I must tell thee</LINE>
<LINE>plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge; and either</LINE>
<LINE>I must shortly hear from him, or I will subscribe</LINE>
<LINE>him a coward. And, I pray thee now, tell me for</LINE>
<LINE>which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For them all together; which maintained so politic</LINE>
<LINE>a state of evil that they will not admit any good</LINE>
<LINE>part to intermingle with them. But for which of my</LINE>
<LINE>good parts did you first suffer love for me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Suffer love! a good epithet! I do suffer love</LINE>
<LINE>indeed, for I love thee against my will.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>In spite of your heart, I think; alas, poor heart!</LINE>
<LINE>If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for</LINE>
<LINE>yours; for I will never love that which my friend hates.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It appears not in this confession: there's not one</LINE>
<LINE>wise man among twenty that will praise himself.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that lived in</LINE>
<LINE>the lime of good neighbours. If a man do not erect</LINE>
<LINE>in this age his own tomb ere he dies, he shall live</LINE>
<LINE>no longer in monument than the bell rings and the</LINE>
<LINE>widow weeps.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And how long is that, think you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Question: why, an hour in clamour and a quarter in</LINE>
<LINE>rheum: therefore is it most expedient for the</LINE>
<LINE>wise, if Don Worm, his conscience, find no</LINE>
<LINE>impediment to the contrary, to be the trumpet of his</LINE>
<LINE>own virtues, as I am to myself. So much for</LINE>
<LINE>praising myself, who, I myself will bear witness, is</LINE>
<LINE>praiseworthy: and now tell me, how doth your cousin?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Very ill.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And how do you?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Very ill too.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Serve God, love me and mend. There will I leave</LINE>
<LINE>you too, for here comes one in haste.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter URSULA</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>URSULA</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Madam, you must come to your uncle. Yonder's old</LINE>
<LINE>coil at home: it is proved my Lady Hero hath been</LINE>
<LINE>falsely accused, the prince and Claudio mightily</LINE>
<LINE>abused; and Don John is the author of all, who is</LINE>
<LINE>fed and gone. Will you come presently?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Will you go hear this news, signior?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be</LINE>
<LINE>buried in thy eyes; and moreover I will go with</LINE>
<LINE>thee to thy uncle's.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE III. A church.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and three or four
with tapers</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Is this the monument of Leonato?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Lord</SPEAKER>
<LINE>It is, my lord.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Reading out of a scroll</STAGEDIR></LINE>
<LINE>Done to death by slanderous tongues</LINE>
<LINE>Was the Hero that here lies:</LINE>
<LINE>Death, in guerdon of her wrongs,</LINE>
<LINE>Gives her fame which never dies.</LINE>
<LINE>So the life that died with shame</LINE>
<LINE>Lives in death with glorious fame.</LINE>
<LINE>Hang thou there upon the tomb,</LINE>
<LINE>Praising her when I am dumb.</LINE>
<LINE>Now, music, sound, and sing your solemn hymn.</LINE>
<SUBHEAD>SONG.</SUBHEAD>
<LINE>Pardon, goddess of the night,</LINE>
<LINE>Those that slew thy virgin knight;</LINE>
<LINE>For the which, with songs of woe,</LINE>
<LINE>Round about her tomb they go.</LINE>
<LINE>Midnight, assist our moan;</LINE>
<LINE>Help us to sigh and groan,</LINE>
<LINE>Heavily, heavily:</LINE>
<LINE>Graves, yawn and yield your dead,</LINE>
<LINE>Till death be uttered,</LINE>
<LINE>Heavily, heavily.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Now, unto thy bones good night!</LINE>
<LINE>Yearly will I do this rite.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, masters; put your torches out:</LINE>
<LINE>The wolves have prey'd; and look, the gentle day,</LINE>
<LINE>Before the wheels of Phoebus, round about</LINE>
<LINE>Dapples the drowsy east with spots of grey.</LINE>
<LINE>Thanks to you all, and leave us: fare you well.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, masters: each his several way.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, let us hence, and put on other weeds;</LINE>
<LINE>And then to Leonato's we will go.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And Hymen now with luckier issue speed's</LINE>
<LINE>Than this for whom we render'd up this woe.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
<SCENE><TITLE>SCENE IV. A room in LEONATO'S house.</TITLE>
<STAGEDIR>Enter LEONATO, ANTONIO, BENEDICK, BEATRICE,
MARGARET, URSULA, FRIAR FRANCIS, and HERO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Did I not tell you she was innocent?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>So are the prince and Claudio, who accused her</LINE>
<LINE>Upon the error that you heard debated:</LINE>
<LINE>But Margaret was in some fault for this,</LINE>
<LINE>Although against her will, as it appears</LINE>
<LINE>In the true course of all the question.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, I am glad that all things sort so well.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And so am I, being else by faith enforced</LINE>
<LINE>To call young Claudio to a reckoning for it.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Well, daughter, and you gentle-women all,</LINE>
<LINE>Withdraw into a chamber by yourselves,</LINE>
<LINE>And when I send for you, come hither mask'd.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt Ladies</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>The prince and Claudio promised by this hour</LINE>
<LINE>To visit me. You know your office, brother:</LINE>
<LINE>You must be father to your brother's daughter</LINE>
<LINE>And give her to young Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Which I will do with confirm'd countenance.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Friar, I must entreat your pains, I think.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To do what, signior?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>To bind me, or undo me; one of them.</LINE>
<LINE>Signior Leonato, truth it is, good signior,</LINE>
<LINE>Your niece regards me with an eye of favour.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>That eye my daughter lent her: 'tis most true.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And I do with an eye of love requite her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The sight whereof I think you had from me,</LINE>
<LINE>From Claudio and the prince: but what's your will?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Your answer, sir, is enigmatical:</LINE>
<LINE>But, for my will, my will is your good will</LINE>
<LINE>May stand with ours, this day to be conjoin'd</LINE>
<LINE>In the state of honourable marriage:</LINE>
<LINE>In which, good friar, I shall desire your help.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My heart is with your liking.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And my help.</LINE>
<LINE>Here comes the prince and Claudio.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter DON PEDRO and CLAUDIO, and two or
three others</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow to this fair assembly.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, prince; good morrow, Claudio:</LINE>
<LINE>We here attend you. Are you yet determined</LINE>
<LINE>To-day to marry with my brother's daughter?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll hold my mind, were she an Ethiope.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Call her forth, brother; here's the friar ready.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Exit ANTONIO</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Good morrow, Benedick. Why, what's the matter,</LINE>
<LINE>That you have such a February face,</LINE>
<LINE>So full of frost, of storm and cloudiness?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I think he thinks upon the savage bull.</LINE>
<LINE>Tush, fear not, man; we'll tip thy horns with gold</LINE>
<LINE>And all Europa shall rejoice at thee,</LINE>
<LINE>As once Europa did at lusty Jove,</LINE>
<LINE>When he would play the noble beast in love.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Bull Jove, sir, had an amiable low;</LINE>
<LINE>And some such strange bull leap'd your father's cow,</LINE>
<LINE>And got a calf in that same noble feat</LINE>
<LINE>Much like to you, for you have just his bleat.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>For this I owe you: here comes other reckonings.</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Re-enter ANTONIO, with the Ladies masked</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>Which is the lady I must seize upon?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>ANTONIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>This same is she, and I do give you her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then she's mine. Sweet, let me see your face.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, that you shall not, till you take her hand</LINE>
<LINE>Before this friar and swear to marry her.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Give me your hand: before this holy friar,</LINE>
<LINE>I am your husband, if you like of me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And when I lived, I was your other wife:</LINE>
<STAGEDIR>Unmasking</STAGEDIR>
<LINE>And when you loved, you were my other husband.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Another Hero!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Nothing certainer:</LINE>
<LINE>One Hero died defiled, but I do live,</LINE>
<LINE>And surely as I live, I am a maid.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>The former Hero! Hero that is dead!</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>She died, my lord, but whiles her slander lived.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>FRIAR FRANCIS</SPEAKER>
<LINE>All this amazement can I qualify:</LINE>
<LINE>When after that the holy rites are ended,</LINE>
<LINE>I'll tell you largely of fair Hero's death:</LINE>
<LINE>Meantime let wonder seem familiar,</LINE>
<LINE>And to the chapel let us presently.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Soft and fair, friar. Which is Beatrice?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE><STAGEDIR>Unmasking</STAGEDIR> I answer to that name. What is your will?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do not you love me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, no; no more than reason.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then your uncle and the prince and Claudio</LINE>
<LINE>Have been deceived; they swore you did.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Do not you love me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Troth, no; no more than reason.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Why, then my cousin Margaret and Ursula</LINE>
<LINE>Are much deceived; for they did swear you did.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>They swore that you were almost sick for me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>They swore that you were well-nigh dead for me.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>'Tis no such matter. Then you do not love me?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>No, truly, but in friendly recompense.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, cousin, I am sure you love the gentleman.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And I'll be sworn upon't that he loves her;</LINE>
<LINE>For here's a paper written in his hand,</LINE>
<LINE>A halting sonnet of his own pure brain,</LINE>
<LINE>Fashion'd to Beatrice.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>HERO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>And here's another</LINE>
<LINE>Writ in my cousin's hand, stolen from her pocket,</LINE>
<LINE>Containing her affection unto Benedick.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>A miracle! here's our own hands against our hearts.</LINE>
<LINE>Come, I will have thee; but, by this light, I take</LINE>
<LINE>thee for pity.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BEATRICE</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I would not deny you; but, by this good day, I yield</LINE>
<LINE>upon great persuasion; and partly to save your life,</LINE>
<LINE>for I was told you were in a consumption.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Peace! I will stop your mouth.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Kissing her</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>DON PEDRO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>How dost thou, Benedick, the married man?</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I'll tell thee what, prince; a college of</LINE>
<LINE>wit-crackers cannot flout me out of my humour. Dost</LINE>
<LINE>thou think I care for a satire or an epigram? No:</LINE>
<LINE>if a man will be beaten with brains, a' shall wear</LINE>
<LINE>nothing handsome about him. In brief, since I do</LINE>
<LINE>purpose to marry, I will think nothing to any</LINE>
<LINE>purpose that the world can say against it; and</LINE>
<LINE>therefore never flout at me for what I have said</LINE>
<LINE>against it; for man is a giddy thing, and this is my</LINE>
<LINE>conclusion. For thy part, Claudio, I did think to</LINE>
<LINE>have beaten thee, but in that thou art like to be my</LINE>
<LINE>kinsman, live unbruised and love my cousin.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>CLAUDIO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>I had well hoped thou wouldst have denied Beatrice,</LINE>
<LINE>that I might have cudgelled thee out of thy single</LINE>
<LINE>life, to make thee a double-dealer; which, out of</LINE>
<LINE>question, thou wilt be, if my cousin do not look</LINE>
<LINE>exceedingly narrowly to thee.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Come, come, we are friends: let's have a dance ere</LINE>
<LINE>we are married, that we may lighten our own hearts</LINE>
<LINE>and our wives' heels.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>LEONATO</SPEAKER>
<LINE>We'll have dancing afterward.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>First, of my word; therefore play, music. Prince,</LINE>
<LINE>thou art sad; get thee a wife, get thee a wife:</LINE>
<LINE>there is no staff more reverend than one tipped with horn.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Enter a Messenger</STAGEDIR>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>Messenger</SPEAKER>
<LINE>My lord, your brother John is ta'en in flight,</LINE>
<LINE>And brought with armed men back to Messina.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<SPEECH>
<SPEAKER>BENEDICK</SPEAKER>
<LINE>Think not on him till to-morrow:</LINE>
<LINE>I'll devise thee brave punishments for him.</LINE>
<LINE>Strike up, pipers.</LINE>
</SPEECH>
<STAGEDIR>Dance</STAGEDIR>
<STAGEDIR>Exeunt</STAGEDIR>
</SCENE>
</ACT>
</PLAY>
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