THE ENABLE LIST: AN INTRODUCTION
                     


Mendel has asked me to write a few words on my perspectives on the 
production and validation of the ENABLE list. So here they are. Note that my 
contribution to this work began at the point at which the words of more than 
eight letters (for which MW10 was the only source) were added to the list. 
Thus the emphasis on MW10 in what follows. I should also note that my 
comments apply specifically to the ENABLE list with the "signature words" 
removed. While I understand the reasons for the inclusion of signature words 
(and indeed, contributed to their selection), I consider the list without 
signatures to be the base or primary version. It is certainly the only form 
of the list subject to objective evaluation. 

The most important thing to understand about the ENABLE list is what sort of 
thing it is. Do not criticise the list on the grounds of common sense, 
linguistic erudition, or references other than MW10. ENABLE is not a work of 
scholarship: rather, it is a work of scriptural exegesis. Its perspective is 
that the god Merweb (also called Mahweh) has given us a holy book referred 
to as MW10, which its devotees are required to take literally. Like all 
useful holy books, it is upon occasion obscure, incomplete and at odds with 
what we call mundane reality. Our job is to extract from this book a subset 
of its lexicon, according to certain rules, without going beyond the bounds 
of legitimate interpretation. Because it pleased Him to do so, Merweb failed 
to include in His revelation certain information necessary for this task, 
namely, consistent information about inflections and, for certain sets of 
words, parts of speech. In order to obtain this information, it has been 
necessary to consult with other interpreters of the tradition, such as the 
Hasbro CD-ROM, and, in extremis, the holy writings of other Peoples of the 
Book, notably the scriptures of the gods Ahweb, Rahweb and Webnew. Such 
consultations have been performed with care; when the letter of MW10 was 
inadequate, we at least attempted to remain true to its spirit and discover 
that which Merweb would have revealed to us, had He not in His wisdom 
decided to challenge us with a Mystery or two. 

There was also an issue here which does not occur with most Scriptures, 
which is that the revelation of Merweb is a continuing revelation. Since it 
is impossible for any mortal to accurately prophesy the future revelations 
of a divinity, of necessity we have had to be content with using the most 
current available texts. We have especially taken note of the new TWL98 
revelation; as the most recent addition to the canon, its contents and its 
implications have great importance, and have significantly affected the 
final version of ENABLE. (Note that sinners such as ourselves have not been 
allowed to see the actual text of TWL98, lest it consume us utterly. We are 
relying on second-hand reports of its contents, which appear adequate for 
our purposes.) As Merweb continues to refine His Word(s), the ENABLE list 
will gradually become less and less reliable. We are forced to accept this 
limitation, but are cheered by the expectation that ENABLE will be succeeded 
by another more worthy (and more wordy) compilation before it becomes 
entirely useless. 

To give a simple example of the literalism required in the compilation of 
ENABLE, MW10 states that "oxymora" is the only acceptable plural of 
"oxymoron". Other traditions disagree, and the compilers of this list 
themselves would not be caught dead saying "oxymora"; nevertheless, the 
burden of literalism mandates that "oxymorons" not be accepted, even though 
no one can doubt that it is the plural most commonly used by unbelievers. 
(For the record, it should be noted that, even though their work is perhaps 
most valuable for those whose faith in the perfection of the Merwebian 
revelation is unshakable, the compilers of the ENABLE list consider 
themselves students of comparative religion, and profess no faith in 
Merwebian dogma themselves.) 

Here is another example of the difficulties of interpreting MW10, in this 
case an issue on which the interpreters were unable to agree. Consider the 
word "omphaloskepsis". Meditate on it in the lotus position. An important 
and unique revelation of Merweb is that all singular nouns have plurals 
(even words like "contraoctave" and "ogham" which would seem to admit of 
*no* sensible plural). What, then, is the Merwebian plural of 
"omphaloskepsis"? MW10 does not show a plural, but Merweb answers many such 
questions indirectly, as described in the "Inflected Forms" portion of the 
MW10 Explanatory Notes. "omphaloskepsis" ends in -sis, so perhaps the 
statement that the plural of -sis is -ses applies. However, "omphaloskepsis" 
also ends in "skepsis", which is itself listed in MW10, without an explicit 
plural. Now the secondary sources come into play. "skepsis" is listed in 
OSPD (the Omnibus Scriptures of Pedantic Deities), a syncretistic work 
combining the revelations of Merweb with those of the other deities listed 
above, as well as the ancient and almost forgotten god Funkwag. OSPD states, 
without equivocation, that the only plural of "skepsis" is "skepsises", 
implying the similar form "omphaloskepsises". Other consultations were made: 
the Hasbro compilation accepts the form "omphaloskepses", and does not speak 
to "omphaloskepsises", since this hexadecagrammaton is outside the 
boundaries to which that compendium is restricted. The ENABLE compilers were 
unable to agree on the resolution of this conundrum. Mendel holds that 
Merweb could hardly have been so silly as to imply the existence of 
"omphaloskepsises", while I myself hold that if Merweb had wished us to 
accept "omphaloskepses", He would have so annotated either the entry for 
"omphaloskepsis" or the OSPD entry for "skepsis", lest He otherwise violate 
His own commandments and lead His disciples into confusion. Because the 
ENABLE list is intended to be used in circumstances where allowing each 
believer his or her own interpretation is infeasible, it was necessary to 
make a decision (and therefore, let all know that the plural *is* 
"omphaloskepses"); however, users of ENABLE should be aware that such 
choices were made, and we can only pray that the God was with us and 
moved us to choose correctly.

Finally, I note that whenever Scriptural literalism is discussed some 
smart aleck is likely to bring up an error so egregious as to seemingly cast 
doubt on any reliance whatever on the authority of the work in question. For 
instance, a liberal Christian may challenge his Fundamentalist brethren by 
bringing up the passage in I Kings which implies that the value of pi is 3. 
I will bring up a similar case here, in order to illustrate how such 
objections may be disposed of. In its list of words beginning with the 
prefix co-, MW10 includes the apparently nonsensical word "coresidenttial". 
Does Merweb actually expect us to believe in this word, especially when the 
implied "residenttial" is not listed? Of course not. This is a human error 
in reducing the ineffable revelation to printed form, and of no more 
substance than the 17th century Bible which omitted the word "not" from the 
Seventh Commandment. We know better than to think that adultery is a moral 
requirement, and similarly, we know better than to attempt to play 
"coresidenttial" in a serious game of Scrabble (tm), no matter how great the 
temptation. (Some of us have been known, admittedly, to play it in our 
hearts, where it always falls on a triple-word score.) 

In short, our faith in the essential truth of the Merwebian corpus allows us 
to detect and overcome the insignificant errors which have occasionally 
crept in due to the God's necessary use of fallible man to bring His 
revelation to the world. Like previous interpreters of the tradition, we 
have no doubt that we have occasionally stumbled ourselves, but we also feel 
sure that any such missteps will be discovered in their turn, and all to the 
greater glory of Merweb and the marvelous language of which He is still the 
foremost avatar. 




Scrabble is a trademark of the Milton Bradley Co., Inc. Forever and ever. 
Amen. 




---Alan Beale